Wake n Bake, Nothing Better!

[Laughing Grass]

I have definitely been so high it mimicked dumb drunk. Tinctures really get me blazed.

I've been yellowbeard drunk a few times.

 

[Paul Drake]

I lost my shoes, ripped my jeans. My dad found me sitting on a curb. He pulled up and asked if I wanted to go home. I said yes. There were three sheriffs cars in front of my house. I’m glad I don’t remember it all.
First time seeing a therapist, hahahaa. I was 14 and played games with her.

 

[shnkrmn]

Long ago a friend and I dropped some tabs and went for an evening stroll. A fine mellow time. We were walking along a road with a deep drainage ditch beside it and we started hearing two voices up ahead. We then came upon 2 persons down in the ditch. They were really well dressed for ditchdwellers, party dress on one coat and tie on the other and they were milling around in the ditch unable to get out. So we stopped to watch and giggle lol. Then we got their attention and helped them out of the ditch. Then we all started talking and laughing at once and simultaneously realized EVERYBODY was tripping. So we all strolled along having a hilarious time until we got to the house they belonged at where we parted ways never to meet again. Just another night in the 70s

 

[Jeffislovinlife]

Coffee to all may you have a great day and a better night

 

[shnkrmn]

Sideshow Bob weed

 

[ANC]

I have an ex who has three kids and she wanted to be assured her vajayjay wasn’t too big and was the normal size. She had three 10 lb babies.
I assured her.

What do you get when cross a bunny with an elephant?
A bunny with an arsehole THIS big!

 

[Laughing Grass]

Sideshow Bob weedView attachment 5200538
View attachment 5200537

Looks frosty! What strain? I had barney's wedding cake that had crazy foxtails. Almost could have wrapped a paper around some of them and made a joint.

 

[DCcan]

Long ago a friend and I dropped some tabs and went for an evening stroll.....Just another night in the 70s

Kids (aka Gen xyz) just think we make up all this drinking driving, no internet, tripping, & cop stories.lol

 

[shnkrmn]

Looks frosty! What strain? I had barney's wedding cake that had crazy foxtails. Almost could have wrapped a paper around some of them and made a joint.

View attachment 5200539

Bruce Banner

 

[BarnBuster]

I don't care about the tickets lol, I don't like the kid idea.

If she was/or has the potential to be a "good" friend, shouldn't you be able to talk to her openly about the kid and how you feel? If not, tell whatever lie you can live with (and more importantly remember for the future).

 

[JustRolling]

Got up at 3 to pee. Wheeled over what I thought was a cat toy or shoe or something but I didn’t care cause I had to pee.
Focus my eyes and I ran through the biggest pile of dog shit I’ve ever seen.
I wheeled to get Barbie and realized I was slinging shit from running through it. I also ran over my new pair of vans.
She cleaned it up and the dog in the meantime is outside chasing armadillos and has one trapped under the ramp.
Great fkn morning.
Sorry for being a smart ass.

Don’t take this the wrong way but that’s funny shit right there . It’s the life of living with a wheelchair and you just have to roll with it . You haven’t done anything that I already have done . There’s some perks though. Let’s say you go in a store with some friends and out of nowhere you just start acting like a total moron . Repeating yourself asking for M&M’s because you didn’t poop your pants. Sure people will look at you but they know any different. The people you’re with though will be mortified and well worth the look on their faces .

 

[DCcan]

I've done the dogshit dance on a couple occasions, then the smell hits you.
One of the few times my eyeballs try to hide in the back of my skull, and then the synapses start to misfire as your body tries to flee in different directions, the brain is trying to black it all out.

 

[RetiredToker76]

Good morning, happy Tuesday.

Serious Am I the Asshole question.

We decided we're going out for dinner on Saturday then go to Lumina once it's dark, I asked a friend that I haven't seen in a while if she wants to join us. She's dating a guy who has a 12 year old son. She replies yes she wants to come, says she's bringing this kid, then asks me to get them tickets and she'll pay me back on her payday... she didn't actually say when her pay day is, so now I'm annoyed. We either have to not go or lie and say plans changed and go without them.

Sell the kid on the black market, recoup the ticket costs, pick up an ounce with the change on the way home afterwards. Have her tell the boytoy that the world's overpopulated anyway.

 

[BarnBuster]

Sell the kid on the black market...

My Niece Had a Toilet Baby

She has been staying with me for a couple of months. Last night she dropped a toilet baby on me. I cut the umbilical cord and pinched it off with a chip clip. I think they eventually dry up and fall off, right? I'm a little out of the loop. Where should we sell it? How much do you think...

rollitup.org

and of course if you need an "extra" kid or 2...

I bought a baby on CL last night

I was bored and perusing shit for sale when there was a listing for a baby for $40. The mom just emailed me wanting it back, but I bet she is just going to sell it again tonight for more crack or something. Maybe she needs it for food stamps or welfare; I don;t know, but black black no trade back!

rollitup.org

 

[Laughing Grass]

If she was/or has the potential to be a "good" friend, shouldn't you be able to talk to her openly about the kid and how you feel? If not, tell whatever lie you can live with (and more importantly remember for the future).

I chickened out and told her we had to cancel.

 

[Laughing Grass]

 

[DarkWeb]

I chickened out and told her we had to cancel.

I called it

 

[Laughing Grass]

View attachment 5200550
I called it

That I'm an asshole?

 

[DarkWeb]

Fucking fuck fuck! More than a 50% rejection on these parts that took 12+ weeks to get

 

[Laughing Grass]