Got chewed out for a spliter

[Japanfreak]

Wife just chewed me out got a spliter, you know, when you're taking a piss and for no reason a stream splits off and flies across the room. I told her it happens to all men, but now I'm not so sure.

 

[JustAnotherFriedDay]

Tell her you didn't do it on purpose, plain and simple. If she can't understand that, she needs to go fuck off.
No reason to chew someone out for something they didn't even control.

I don't get this ever, but I'm only 19.

 

[Japanfreak]

lol, well when I say chewed out I'm exaggerating, more playful jibbing but she says I have to start pee sitting down, and maybe it's my age, but it's starting to look like a good idea. But these damn toilets here are so short, like kiddy toilets.

 

[Grumpy Old Dreamer]

Just tell her to clean it up

 

[JustAnotherFriedDay]

Oh, then she's got a sense of humor. I thought she was genuinely pissed off you peed on the walls. haha

 

[Little Tommy]

One of the other joys of growing old is that the gravity pulling on your ball sack over 50+ years causes scrotal elongation (my word) and you can sit on your nuts if not properly secured. I guess my free balling days are over. I mostly get splitters when I whizz in the middle of the night.

 

[undtecd420]

Yup just got bitched at yesterday. LMFAO!!! Except she was doing her hair and I got her foot!! I'm tall as shit so it doesn't help being so far away! I want a urinal in my new house! That would be the shit

 

[NLXSK1]

Yeah, splitters get more common as you age...

 

[Unnk]

one question not trying to be uber personal but did you guys screw just alittle before or alot that night before? that shit is usually the cuase of hte splitter left over semen in the urinary tract youll be aiming right but be pissin in the trash can 2 feet to the left of the toilet

 

[racerboy71]

yah, chics so don't get man pissing.. its not the easiest thing to do.. half the time, i don't even know in what direction my stream is going to go in intill i start going, and at that point, its a lil late if i was a lil off to say the left or the right..
but growing up in a house full of women, i learned years ago that sometimes its just easier to sit and piss than to have to listen to the bs that comes when i miss or get some on the seat, or heaven forbid, the big no no of leaving the seat up, like chics can't look back to make sure the seat is down before they sit right.. i always look to make sure its up before i go, so i never understood why its such a big problem for them to look first as well.. but now i'm getting a lil off topic, lol...

 

[purplehazin]

I found that usually happens in the mornings when you take that morning piss. I've never hit my wife though with a stream lol

Also agree with Racerboy... it's better to avoid the potential problems by sitting down than standing up and going.

 

[guy incognito]

I sit down when I pee. There's nothing that crazy 'bout me. I'm just takin' a wiz, mind your own biz! Why is everybody always starin' at me?

 

[Nice Ol Bud]

Happens To Everyone

 

[DSB65]

I usually piss off my back deck...live in country...but then i get these backwards piss...so then its all over my house shoes or pajama bottoms....

 

[cmt1984]

lmfao, thats too funny that some of you have hit people with splitters. i only get splitters after sex...or some nice alone time.

 

[Matt Rize]

this thread is too funny. splitters are normal, especially after some chaka chaka.

Peeing with a boner is even worse, then you make a real mess. Especially if you sneeze.

 

[ANC]

I usually piss off my back deck...live in country...but then i get these backwards piss...so then its all over my house shoes or pajama bottoms....

I KNOW!!!!! and then we are like all WTF!!!!!

 

[gogrow]

yet another reason why I piss in the sink at night

 

[fdd2blk]

yet another reason why I piss in the sink at night

i knew you'd show up.

 

[Matt Rize]

yet another reason why I piss in the sink at night

my new troll handle is "sinkpisser" lol