Could Christ Be Elected President?

Nutes and Nugs

Well-Known Member
Save Gas!
No Jackrabbit Starts!

lol, they used to say this in the gas rationing efforts in the 70's.
All those muscle cars.......
 

mudminer

Active Member
George, I'm certain that (even if none of it AFTER age 28 was included) your mental history would insure you didn't get far in this particular endeavor.
 

Pinworm

Well-Known Member
George, I'm certain that (even if none of it AFTER age 28 was included) your mental history would insure you didn't get far in this particular endeavor.
It's a good thing no one really could give less of a shit then, aye?
 

Dr Kynes

Well-Known Member
The Mormons claim Jesus was born in the USA. lol

Jesus could not be president as he tells the truth.
Unlike other politicians.

no.


that is untrue


mormon doctrine claims that after his assumption into heaven, post resurrection, jeebus descended from heaven in the americas to minister to his "other flock"

no mormon doctrine asserts that jeebus was born for a second time in the americas.

mormonism is chock full of crazy, from god living on an alien world named kolob, to multiple spirit-marriages, to magical submarines taking israelites to the new world, to the magical golden plates, to magical "seer stones" that allow for translation of those imaginary golden plates, to central american imaginary golden plates being hidden in upstate new york.

you dont have to polish that turd, it stinks just fine without any help.
 

Pinworm

Well-Known Member
no.


that is untrue


mormon doctrine claims that after his assumption into heaven, post resurrection, jeebus descended from heaven in the americas to minister to his "other flock"

no mormon doctrine asserts that jeebus was born for a second time in the americas.

mormonism is chock full of crazy, from god living on an alien world named kolob, to multiple spirit-marriages, to magical submarines taking israelites to the new world, to the magical golden plates, to magical "seer stones" that allow for translation of those imaginary golden plates, to central american imaginary golden plates being hidden in upstate new york.

you dont have to polish that turd, it stinks just fine without any help.
I fucking lawl'd, puty hard.
 

Pinworm

Well-Known Member
funniest part of the joke:

it's not a joke.

mormonism actually asserts all that shit, and more.

and then theres the catholics...
[video=youtube;a6ZcA4uGgRI]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a6ZcA4uGgRI[/video]

It's sooo fucking strange. I like JUST watched the SP episode, and even though it's not contractually obligated to be a part of my point, i'd still use it as a base for digrace. I fucking laughed my ass off. IDk. Religion makes me fucking lawl. George Carlin said it best.
 

PetFlora

Well-Known Member
Well, first you have decide whether JC was a fictional character introduced by the cabal. If so, then yes, otherwise not a snowball's chance in hell
 

NoDrama

Well-Known Member
I heard they based their religious beliefs on articles dug direct from the earth. Right here in "Murica.
No, they based their religion on a con man who was the son of a grifter. He claimed to find the plates by a divine form of geocaching. Only he could read them and only he could see them. The perfect beginning.

Mormons aren't so bad though, got a good business sense and are extremely family oriented. If apocalypse comes, many Mormons will still be around since having preparations for the end of the world for a year or more is a basic teaching of the religion. Many Mormons have 2 or 3 years of supplies stashed away.
 

Pinworm

Well-Known Member
No, they based their religion on a con man who was the son of a grifter. He claimed to find the plates by a divine form of geocaching. Only he could read them and only he could see them. The perfect beginning.

Mormons aren't so bad though, got a good business sense and are extremely family oriented. If apocalypse comes, many Mormons will still be around since having preparations for the end of the world for a year or more is a basic teaching of the religion. Many Mormons have 2 or 3 years of supplies stashed away.
Woa, bro. Let's get into the stash together, whattaya say?
 

MidwesternGro

Well-Known Member
The Tea Party and Libertarians would hate Jesus because he would damn them to Hell.

Matthew 25:33-46

[SUP]33[/SUP] And he shall set the sheep on his right hand, but the goats on the left.
[SUP]34[/SUP] Then shall the King say unto them on his right hand, Come, ye blessed of my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world:
[SUP]35[/SUP] For I was an hungred, and ye gave me meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me drink: I was a stranger, and ye took me in:
[SUP]36[/SUP] Naked, and ye clothed me: I was sick, and ye visited me: I was in prison, and ye came unto me.
[SUP]37[/SUP] Then shall the righteous answer him, saying, Lord, when saw we thee an hungred, and fed thee? or thirsty, and gave thee drink?
[SUP]38[/SUP] When saw we thee a stranger, and took thee in? or naked, and clothed thee?
[SUP]39[/SUP] Or when saw we thee sick, or in prison, and came unto thee?
[SUP] 40[/SUP]And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me.
[SUP]41[/SUP] Then shall he say also unto them on the left hand, Depart from me, ye cursed, into everlasting fire, prepared for the devil and his angels:
[SUP]42[/SUP] For I was an hungred, and ye gave me no meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me no drink:
[SUP]43[/SUP] I was a stranger, and ye took me not in: naked, and ye clothed me not: sick, and in prison, and ye visited me not.
[SUP]44[/SUP] Then shall they also answer him, saying, Lord, when saw we thee an hungred, or athirst, or a stranger, or naked, or sick, or in prison, and did not minister unto thee?
[SUP]45[/SUP] Then shall he answer them, saying, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye did it not to one of the least of these, ye did it not to me.
[SUP]46[/SUP] And these shall go away into everlasting punishment: but the righteous into life eternal.
 
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