cannabineer
Ursus marijanus
To the bolded:It didn't go straight to the assault. There were numerous times I warned him, and he shrugged it off. The last time he pushed me and said "What ya gonna do?" while laughing. Reasoning and restraint doesn't always work with some people. That's when you need to decide how to handle it. So I ended it, quickly and in undeniable terms. I understand escalating violence, it needs to be taken into account for the situation. If I was worried they'd go to a level I wouldn't I'd find others means. You need to weigh all the options.
I never said this was the only option, only if he involved HR/LEO it takes other options of the table. Civilization? We're still just tribal communities killing each other for basic resources, just now we have bigger sticks. Doesn't seem much different from the last few thousand years.
I hold the opinion that civilization is an exercise in teamwork. The attitude in the bolded portion is, I believe, corrosive to close communities, especially physically but not sentimentally close communities like the suburban workplace. Different rules from, say, a ranch. So personal honor must be redefined from the simpler rural model to something that seeks fairness and maximum collective happiness in a difficult and changing environment.
The other thing I note is that you feel telling HR would disempower you. I disagree. i get great satisfaction from pointing the system at a defect and having it taken care of openly and on record.
I don't have a one-size answer. Only you could tell if you'd ultimately set this prick straighter using your way or the official way. Since I don't know that, I recognize I am arguing abstractions. I notice and much appreciate that you engaged in this discussion boldly and yet civilly. ~tips hat~