Is growing/smoking really your main interest? You seem to share another interest with hyphy and some others. I know that's a male dominated type of thing (my own interests, the ones that have really held me, are also very male-dominated; fishkeeping, riding, fishing, politics, scuba), but, it's a big thing to have a shared interest.
I would NOT trust a stranger, even a stranger you may fuck, until that's the person, you know, "The Person".
Seriously, though, a few people have talked about first being happy with yourself. And it's hard to explain what that is until you've experienced it. I'll try, but with Dave and I what had happened was I had gotten out of a long relationship that ended VERY badly for me. I tried a little dating, didn't meet many men that I was even interested in, so that made it more difficult for me. Then, I went on ONE date with a guy much older than I, he was 52 and I was in my late 30s. He became and instant stalker, but was this stable, well-off man and so my mother, of all people was giving me shit about not digging him so much. After he showed up at my place of work unannounced and uninvited twice, which included him driving by my house after I'd told him I did not want my boys knowing anything about him, I said THAT'S FUCKING
IT!! NO MORE GOD DAMNED MEN!
I decided that having my family was enough for me. It's enough love and it's enough heartache, thank you very much. I was going to please ME, and if I needed a man it was just to get laid.
Shortly after that Dave and I met online, but only became friends. It wasn't til a few months after that that he confessed how I interested him, but I was having none of it. Because I was finished with men, you see. Look where that got me.
It's like water, you can't grab it.
most of the really hot girls dont have much in these departments.... my wife is beautiful; but not a stunning bunny... but she more than fills every one of these aspects you laid out here.... all of my married friends have married a woman who isnt quite as attractive as the girls they used to date/sleep with... maybe it means nothing, but maybe it does
Hey, you remember that song about never make a pretty girl your wife?
Honestly, though, if there's that certain kind of love, that person is beautiful. The most beautiful.