Miss MeanWeed
Active Member
Once in my teens, a friend and I grew a patch up some hills. We cleared a circle in amongst a large expanse of prickly berry bush throwing the chopped bush out of the clearing as we went.
We spent the next 2 days hauling in compost and lime and soil and probably close to fifty 1-foot clones in buckets.
Once we had finished we decided that it would be best to have some more animal/people deterrents so we chopped some big Gorse bushes and barricaded the perimeter with masses of spiky impenetrable gorse trees, filling in our exit and entrance tunnel underneath the prickly berry bush as we exited.
We were quite pleased with our efforts as it was a 'dig and dash' effort, we had no intentions of coming back to the site for another 8-12 weeks, and we repeated this round prickle fortress patch pattern a good 5 more times over 2 weeks of back-breaking face-scraping eye-pricking torture.
A few months later it was nearing the time when the local authorities begin their helicopter observations so we thought we'd get in there first and get our girls out.
The cops don't pull it out here, they spray it with some toxic chemical which kills the plant and makes certain foliage turn a rusty orangey brown color.
As we drove to the first location, we could see where our first patch was, as it was a bright orangey brown circle in amongst an entirely green landscape. Horrified, we drove through the next valley to see if any of the others had gone unnoticed and to our horror we saw five orange circlish shapes in the hills.
We lamented our loss, cursed the local authorities, and sat down for a cigarette. As I stared solemnly at the orange patches of death where once our ladies grew, I noticed that they seemed to sort of look more like rings than solid shapes, and I was sure I could see some greenery in the middle of each orange patch.
We decided to take a look at the murder scenes just in case by some miracle a plant or two had survived, but mostly out of morbid curiosity.
As we got closer I smelled the indelible smell of skunk and I became excited that we might yet have a harvest, albeit a much reduced one. We found our markers and knelt down to crawl through the prickle bush tunnels to our patches, and I thought about the forthcoming ouches from removing the gorse stuffing from the tunnels. To my surprise the gorse was light brown and dry as kindling.
" Oh yeah" I thought, "We did chop it down a few months ago, of course it's brown and dried now."
At that moment, I had a eureka moment and realised what a pair of idiots we had been. I cut my way through the gorse and prickle berry bush and found a successful, living patch of hellsmelly skunky with joyous fat buds galore. I looked around and saw, to my own 'how could I be so incredibly dumb' embarrassment, that our pricklebush choppings that we had carefully removed from the growing area and thrown on the surrounding prickle bush, had dried to a nice rusty orange hue, and the gorse we had chopped down to use as animal fortifications, had dried to a nice light brown, creating the effect when seen from afar of an orange/light brown circle, with a green centre, like a huge fucking bullseye in the middle of an antirely green backdrop, with our weed in the centre.
Needless to say, we spent the next 24 hours running through bush harvesting our half-dozen plots, the hills echoing with the laughter of the extra helpers we enlisted to assist with the emergency harvest.
We harvested the most amount of pot I have ever seen, literally filling a small room with trash bags full of nugs. We didn't weigh it because we weren't dealers, but we did find out that a big bag of weed has a lot of bartering power
We truly earned the title of Lucky Fucking Idiots.
Anyone else done anything even remotely as dumb?
We spent the next 2 days hauling in compost and lime and soil and probably close to fifty 1-foot clones in buckets.
Once we had finished we decided that it would be best to have some more animal/people deterrents so we chopped some big Gorse bushes and barricaded the perimeter with masses of spiky impenetrable gorse trees, filling in our exit and entrance tunnel underneath the prickly berry bush as we exited.
We were quite pleased with our efforts as it was a 'dig and dash' effort, we had no intentions of coming back to the site for another 8-12 weeks, and we repeated this round prickle fortress patch pattern a good 5 more times over 2 weeks of back-breaking face-scraping eye-pricking torture.
A few months later it was nearing the time when the local authorities begin their helicopter observations so we thought we'd get in there first and get our girls out.
The cops don't pull it out here, they spray it with some toxic chemical which kills the plant and makes certain foliage turn a rusty orangey brown color.
As we drove to the first location, we could see where our first patch was, as it was a bright orangey brown circle in amongst an entirely green landscape. Horrified, we drove through the next valley to see if any of the others had gone unnoticed and to our horror we saw five orange circlish shapes in the hills.
We lamented our loss, cursed the local authorities, and sat down for a cigarette. As I stared solemnly at the orange patches of death where once our ladies grew, I noticed that they seemed to sort of look more like rings than solid shapes, and I was sure I could see some greenery in the middle of each orange patch.
We decided to take a look at the murder scenes just in case by some miracle a plant or two had survived, but mostly out of morbid curiosity.
As we got closer I smelled the indelible smell of skunk and I became excited that we might yet have a harvest, albeit a much reduced one. We found our markers and knelt down to crawl through the prickle bush tunnels to our patches, and I thought about the forthcoming ouches from removing the gorse stuffing from the tunnels. To my surprise the gorse was light brown and dry as kindling.
" Oh yeah" I thought, "We did chop it down a few months ago, of course it's brown and dried now."
At that moment, I had a eureka moment and realised what a pair of idiots we had been. I cut my way through the gorse and prickle berry bush and found a successful, living patch of hellsmelly skunky with joyous fat buds galore. I looked around and saw, to my own 'how could I be so incredibly dumb' embarrassment, that our pricklebush choppings that we had carefully removed from the growing area and thrown on the surrounding prickle bush, had dried to a nice rusty orange hue, and the gorse we had chopped down to use as animal fortifications, had dried to a nice light brown, creating the effect when seen from afar of an orange/light brown circle, with a green centre, like a huge fucking bullseye in the middle of an antirely green backdrop, with our weed in the centre.
Needless to say, we spent the next 24 hours running through bush harvesting our half-dozen plots, the hills echoing with the laughter of the extra helpers we enlisted to assist with the emergency harvest.
We harvested the most amount of pot I have ever seen, literally filling a small room with trash bags full of nugs. We didn't weigh it because we weren't dealers, but we did find out that a big bag of weed has a lot of bartering power
We truly earned the title of Lucky Fucking Idiots.
Anyone else done anything even remotely as dumb?
