Fuck Me

Yup, right in the pooch.

Then Fuck me again.

God damn tweaking gangbangers. Mothafuckas.

I cannot believe the audacity and the stupidity of some of the people we let wander the streets. Just spent the last couple of hours with LEO's up here. Over some dumbass that took a run at me and the redheaded wonder while we were parked at the general store. This asshat comes charging into the parking lot in a fricking pickup weaving and screeching his tires and stops about 6 inches from the passenger door of the benz. With his brights on. Gets out and starts to give me a mouthful of crap then comes and yanks my freaking door open. What in the fuckity fuck fuck world is going on? We just bought groceries! I have no clue who he is and he's got the banger tat's and tude.

Jaysus P Mahoney!

Now this ass is on the ground and bleeding like a stuck pig and CRYING. People come pouring out
wanting to know what the hell happened. I asked for someone to dial up security and the po-po.

Leo's roll up, ambulance pulls in and starts working on the douchebag.

Johnny Law 1 pulls me over to the side and the questions start coming. Told him when my door got yanked open I came out and tapped douchebag twice. End of story. Johnny Law 2 starts to go into my car. I object. Loudly. Johnny 1 decides I'm a threat and cuffs me up. Red tells #2 no consent, call our attorney, not going in the vehicle. Red gets cuffed. Fuckity.

After a couple hours of fuckity fuck they come in and tell me this schmuck was life flighted out. My attorney still has not shown up and they want answers. What the fuck ya gonna do? I'm soiling my best sunday shorts. They got me by the short ones. (yeah, I did it.) And just when they start to put some heat on about Red, and I'd better let them yada yada, in walks Golden Boy.

Find a God damned good attorney. Give him a nice fat, and I mean a FAT retainer. The kind of retainer that he'll break away from family on Mothers day and drive 180 miles round trip to save my-your ass.

This rodeo started about 1 pm. Got home at 9.

Fuckity FUCK FUCK. I moved to the mountains to avoid this kind of shite! FUCK!

Fuck me running sideways through a doughnut hole. Twice.

I'm gonna get stoned.

FUCK

bb57

FUCK

so how's the ending play out? im still confused about exactly what happened lol.

was he a gangster wanna be or what...... get an air tazer and a mullet.....Air tazer to control the mountain folk ....mullet to look like one

They want answers for what? You were at the store and got bumrushed. Did they find a stash? illegal gun?

So how did you drop him, damn now I kinda worried about having that grilling contest.
Don't want to piss you off.

Good job taking care of yourself though. Did you have incriminating materials in the Benz?
What did Red have to say about all this?

Tommorow will be a better day!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You punched him in the face twice and he had to be air lifted to the hospital? What are you a professional boxer or something? lol

Was it just a case of mistaken identity or was he going to rob you?

Iolite.

Bong.

spliff.

I'm medicating and will be right back.

Let me get this straight. You got bumrushed at the grocery store by a crackhead, you reacted fast and capped him twice, and you got caught with some weed stuff? is this right?

im confused. so u were smoking dope in the supermarket, then a gang member tried to recruit u to his gang? u said no so he began to fight with u. then u hit him twice and the hellicopters landed on the roof ? im still confused.

a mongo frog said:

im confused. so u were smoking dope in the supermarket, then a gang member tried to recruit u to his gang? u said no so he began to fight with u. then u hit him twice and the hellicopters landed on the roof ? im still confused.

Click to expand...

LOL. and this is how rumors get started. hilarious either way though.

Jeez Boomer are you smoking the whole bag, everybody is waiting for the rest of the story.

He must of got done smoking and started making a sandwich. lol

Or building the suspense as the requests pile up. WTF dude, you shot a crackhead, how dare you wanna smoke a bunch of weed.

Yeah dude, I'm hooked! Put down the bong and finish the story dude LOL!

i still dont understand. a crack head aproched u for a blow job,u said no and punched him in the face? u ran inside the super market where u saw Red from shawshank ?

Christ, I always have something incriminating. Stupid laws. No stash though.

And fer chrissakes I'm an old guy, 53. Clan of the Jar-Jars but crap, 53.

Closed his throat on the first. I fucked up and palmed his nose up on the second. That's causing trouble.

like I said, no clue to who the clown was. Came right outta left field. I had just put bags of groceries in the trunk and got in the damn car.

Red's pissed cause I got some wine colored stains on a new shirt and ruined it. And after all the bullshit she sat through she says I should have
just,,,,,,,,

Well, that's a Redheads thinking, not mine.

Got to be some real bad drugs or booze floating around for this kind of shit to happen.

Leo's on the scene believed I used some kind of weapon. I was not carrying, nor did I use any weapons.

30 seconds earlier while in the trunk? Let's just say a new windshield would have been the very least of his problems.

I had a couple of Digital SLR's and Point and shoots in the car, Red's got that damn ring on her finger.

I thought I was getting jacked, or at least robbed.



No, I'm not a boxer. Was just yer good ol' fashioned 03 fer 30. A Grunt. Three Up. Four Down. Lil' Diamond in the middle.

This whole dealio got my bp up to 170 over 80. I need to relax and bake.

I'm working on being a nice guy, really, I am. That counting to ten thingy is supposed to help but it ain't. I cheat and count by 5's.

Fuck me.

Yo what if hes getting interrogated at his house right now, and the cop finds his laptop open with RIU pulled up. Deputy dog posts some gay porn shit as his avatar.

I really hope your groceries were ok and your ice cream didn't melt. You need to keep the meat chilled too.

Oorah. Hope it all turns out well.

Damn Sgt. major don't u know hand to hand combat is illegal for use against civilians. my dad was primary 97 tango GSE secondary 03 fer 17. he wore 3 up after pulling a pistol on a captain in japan for a weapon of a sentry and retired shortly after