Growing with kids in the house, what do you say?

mrpuffins

Well-Known Member
For those of you have kids, are your children aware at all of your plants? if so what is your message?

When I had a big set up they were under 4 so it really didn't matter. now my oldest is 7.

I don't want to hide it so as to demonize it, but of course don't think it's appropriate to show them the full everything. I don't smoke in front of them or talk about it at all so that's not a thing for them yet.

My thought ishe to let them see and know that daddy gardens and likes flowers. but that's it. no visibility to harvest or curing or smoking, just natural plant life progression.

Thoughts from parents?

Non- parents I know when I didn't have kids my answer was very different than now so I would appreciate answers just from those dealing with that with their kids thanks
 

GroErr

Well-Known Member
A lot of variables to each situation. Personally I kept it outdoor until their teens when they could understand what is was and why I grew it, then shared it with them but also explained that not everyone looked at it as medicine so it was a family secret and not to be shared outside the family. Later my son took an interest in growing and grew with me. It was never taboo, my son still grows (he's 35 now) but I have a hard time talking him into smoking a joint, he doesn't smoke much at all but he takes coconut oil caps daily like I do. My daughter never liked the feeling of being high and doesn't smoke at all but has no issues with it.

The problem with little one's is not so much them, they are aware of a lot of things we don't give them credit for. But they're also not necessarily aware of the stigmas around it, particularly in illegal areas and could easily blurt out that "my daddy grows really smelly plants in our basement" in the wrong situation.

I have grandkids the age of your kids and older now and will share it with them when they're older but for now they don't know I grow and it'll be up to my daughter to explain it to them when she thinks they're ready.
 

mrpuffins

Well-Known Member
GroErr, appreciate the perspective. right now I have a small cabinet I am using so hopefully the stinky basement won't be a thing.....yet......but just a box with some flowers. my oldest saw my book and thought the flowers were super pretty lol. trying to balance being careful and safe with education and transparency.

Sunni - use to be in Colorado :( Minnesota now... Fair point but I don't want to play into the stigma....fucking government Bullshit

Srh88 - well played sir...
 

sunni

Administrator
Staff member
GroErr, appreciate the perspective. right now I have a small cabinet I am using so hopefully the stinky basement won't be a thing.....yet......but just a box with some flowers. my oldest saw my book and thought the flowers were super pretty lol. trying to balance being careful and safe with education and transparency.

Sunni - use to be in Colorado :( Minnesota now... Fair point but I don't want to play into the stigma....fucking government Bullshit

Srh88 - well played sir...
totally for me its not so much the perceived stigma as the legal aspects and child protective services. idk maybe im over cautious
 

budlover13

King Tut
For those of you have kids, are your children aware at all of your plants? if so what is your message?

When I had a big set up they were under 4 so it really didn't matter. now my oldest is 7.

I don't want to hide it so as to demonize it, but of course don't think it's appropriate to show them the full everything. I don't smoke in front of them or talk about it at all so that's not a thing for them yet.

My thought ishe to let them see and know that daddy gardens and likes flowers. but that's it. no visibility to harvest or curing or smoking, just natural plant life progression.

Thoughts from parents?

Non- parents I know when I didn't have kids my answer was very different than now so I would appreciate answers just from those dealing with that with their kids thanks
My son knew by the time he was 8. Dad's homeopathic medicine. He turns 17 Friday. We have no issues in this regard. He doesn't, however, like my smoking of tobacco. Trying to address that currently.
 

tyler.durden

Well-Known Member
legal? sure why not
not legal area? no. 100% no.
Agreed. I'd never show my kid my grow, and he's 15. Imo, it's a lot to put on a kid to tell them a secret that would put daddy in prison and likely have DCFS take them away. That's pressure. Kids do strange and unpredictable things: they may think it's cool and tell a bff in confidence, they may feel unsafe and come across abnormal in some situations. Or maybe they'll just slip up, especially if they're high or drunk themselves. The biggest risk to my mind is DCFS, ime they can do anything. They don't need to even substantiate anything, even an anonymous tip can start a full blown investigation. It's amazing how much power they have. My kid knows how I feel about weed, how it is medicine and why prohibition is wrong. He knows I smoke daily, though I never have around him. I don't think he's stupid, though. He hasn't been allowed in my 'office' for 6 years, he's never even seen the door open in that time (I only have him on weekends). He's asked what I do in there, and I tell him that's my private space and my business, no one is allowed in there but me. It's deadbolted, no light, sound or odor is emitted. I make sure he knows the Draconian consequences for growers in illegal states through articles and such, I guess we kind of talk around it. It's a strange situation, but it's the best I can do under the circumstances...
 

bict

Well-Known Member
My boys young, under 4, and he saw my plants getting ready for the outdoors under a t5. I just told him they were vegetables and played cool. As long as you don't make it a big deal, it should be ok.
 

WeedFreak78

Well-Known Member
Double edged sword.

1:You tell them. Act like it's a normal, everyday, thing or tell them is a secret and no one should know. Either way there's a chance they tell someone.

2: You don't tell them, they find out eventually you grow, they wonder why you hide it if you say there's nothing wrong with it,. You perpetuate a stigma about the plant. You have to try to explain at this point why you did what you did, hopefully they are old enough to understand.

My solution, don't have kids.
 

prostheticninja

Well-Known Member
Not a father, but a son of a grower. I used to help my dad out every spring, summer, and early autumn with his plants from the time I was in 8th grade (14ish) until last spring. I had already been smoking independently of my father, and even when I was helping him horticulturally, he never approved of it until I had a job, was paying for myself, graduated, and was going somewhere in life. He always told you weed made you docile and unmotivated, so I think he was just waiting for me to show him that I wasn't like that to begin with lol. Anyway, I never saw an issue, except it was very, very hard to be sitting there smoking with my friends while my dad was at work, all of us talking about our pie in the sky dreams for growing and hash and whatever, and not taking them to see the trees that were a hundred yards out of the yard. I never did it, but the temptation was there. I think that that's deadly enough. Even if it's legal, you don't want a bunch of rapscallions around your plants. Or all over your kid's Snapchat story. Not saying your kid is a snitch, but if I had a dime for everything stupid I did as a kid, well, I wouldnt have to be growing lol.

Also, don't really know if there is precedent set in this case, but I know parents that have gotten in trouble for their children taking alcohol that they keep in the house. Would hate to see someone, and pay for them with my tax-dollars, get locked up for their kid taking their doobies.
 

Jimdamick

Well-Known Member
I tried to hide my grow, but it ended up that it was impossible. My son was told to not go into the basement, as it was a dangerous place with tools , glass broken on the floor and boogie men. Yea, that lasted for 4 years until he was 13 and came home early from school one day, and came searching for me. I was in my room, music playing, when I turned around and there he was. I closed the door rapidly, and told him it was just some tomato plants that I was growing for your mother. as a surprise. (lol). He looked at me like, wtf, and went back upstairs believing me. That made feel very bad, lying to my son. Anyway, the next day after talking to my wife, we decided that we had to tell him the truth because there was no real way to hide it, which was that his mother was a dope fiend and needed pot to set her straight to face daily hardships. Nah, I'm just kidding. Actually I explained that I used it as a medication for my bi-polar disorder (true), and that it is legal in some countries and some states in the US, and there is nothing wrong with it, if used in moderation, like total NORMAL propaganda. He said that's fine and left it at that. The one thing that is really helping now, is that more states are going legal all the time, so he realizes that it not something that is purely illegal, except in the state that I live in. He also realizes that it is a major source of income (I quit work, am a stay at home dad and grow for profit) He's a very cool kid that has no desire to toke, drink, or smoke. So, to make my long story short,,be honest, because the truth will ALWAYS come out, and they will understand that your not a criminal, just a gardener. I'm pretty sure of that.
 
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mrpuffins

Well-Known Member
Interesting range of experience and perspectives. loving IT! THanks for all the responses so far, hope to keep them coming.
 
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