I feel like im loosing a grip on myself, anyone been through this?

He was probably saying "blow your brains out" like get high, aka blown. I gotta say..MJ is a hell of a drug, and moderation, tho its tough, could be a good thing, for several reasons. Try takin breaks from it, if you'd consider it. I feel ya on trippin out and seein things you'v seen before in life, as a kid. I trip out alot, as in thinkin about shit in your head and you can picture it cause thats how your mind works. I always find myself thinkin about real world situations, its hard not to for me. I dont get mad for no reason as much as i used to, but i know there was always a reason for gettin mad, shit pissed my off when id think about it, but sometimes the plight of others puts me into a rage, i dont act on it i just frown and wish someone would give me an excuse to release my energy. but it subsides of course, and its normal, but for anybody with negative thoughts, just know life throws bad thoughts your way, the best thing to do is have the power to clear your mind and see it for what it is, its hard to explain but there's no point in beating yourself up, just stay strong

RC7 said:

man listen here i feel the SAME shit as u on a daily basis but at times when the thought of death comes to me i dont actually want to die im not suicidal but my mind is fuked up like that too... but i am a completely normal person so people dont know unless i tell em.....well for me ive had a very fuked up childhood went thru hell everyday no exaggerations.... i think that could be a part of why im like that...anyway have u ever had any serious problems or bad times in life that could be the effect of this?

Click to expand...

Yeah I started on ritalin when I was 3, then I was diagnosed adhd and bipolar and maybe something else idk

By the time I was 10 I was taking handfulls of pills, experimental ones too, and rhisperdol... I was even taking anti seizure meds because some of the shit I was taking did that, and some other heart medication for insomnia or something? To this day I have heart issues from that shit, even right now I can feel this sharp pressure like pain in my heart

Anyways I got kicked outta schools all the time and ended up at a few 'special' schools and 'special' ed classes, eventhough I wasn't mentally ill, like that at least.

Then I got sent to clinics weeks at a time, needles in the arms for blood tests, locked in a room with some fucking nutty ass mentally ill kids from Baltimore... I was actually getting blood taken EVERY single Monday (8+ years later and I still remember the day) and needless to say the needles take a toll.... I asked for a minute to compose myself and three of them grabbed me and held me down while they took blood, they gave me like 5 seconds. Now I'm deathly afraid of needles, wasn't before. Thanks.

After that shit for years, until I was about 12 one day when visiting my dad he just took me off of all that shit (parents divorced when I was like two but these days they're nice to eachother and live 10mi from eachother) since then its been normal street, regular schools, public highschool, no meds

guitarabuser said:

The diagnosis you got as a kid is likely exactly what is going on. If you are not seeing a doc for it, you should. Meds for bi-polar are not a fix-all, but they can help smooth out the bumps and jolts of a continually changing perception.

Click to expand...

sometimes i wonder if its part of evolution. that the reason people develop mental illnesses because they're evolving and their perception of the world is changing so much that others cant understand it, so the label people as mental health patients...just an idea...

Matt09784 said:

I think bi-polarism is a bunch of bullshit. Don't tell me you can't control when your happy or angry. Sounds alot like a cop out to me IMHO.

Click to expand...

sounds like you dont have a very good understanding of mental health to me.

speaking as a person with a diagnosed mental health disorder...sometimes we CANT control our thoughts, emotions, and behaviours. it happens too intensely too quickly and our fight or flight response kicks in, and then all rational thought goes out the window (which of course is related to the systems in the brain, the lymbic system specifically). there are skills that are taught in therapy programs to help people learn to control these things...but without that information on *how* to control it, some people just dont know how and they just simply cant.

perhaps before you make judgments about others you should take a moment to learn a bit about different disorders, different people, and try to see things from another persons perspective.

ashtray said:

So blow your brains out

Click to expand...

you really thought that was a useful way to contribute to the discussion?

heres a reply for you...

you first.

Yo sarah next to quote are the quotation marks and a + sign.. click that on all the posts you wanna reply to and then click reply now (reply now is above the thread page links)

Just so you know

Eat healthy,take your vitamins,get a hobby,good sex,etc.I get really down,whenever I get a bad infection.I get these strange thoughts,about life and whats it's meaning.Like,we live less than 100 years,and dissapear.In that time we grow up, meet people,travel,enjoy life,with fam.morn the death of people you love,and welcome new people in this world,etc...But then I hit the doc,get some antibiotics,and im koo.

Sr. Verde said:

Yo sarah next to quote are the quotation marks and a + sign.. click that on all the posts you wanna reply to and then click reply now (reply now is above the thread page links)

Just so you know

Click to expand...

sorry. im confused here...i have a "quote" button, and then a "multi" button and a "quick" button...i dont have a "reply now" option either...at the bottom i have "post quick reply" and "go advanced"..at the top left corner i have a "reply" button, but it just takes me to the regular advanced reply screen...im sorry...i havent mastered the multiple quotes...i just dont know how to do it

sarah22 said:

sorry. im confused here...i have a "quote" button, and then a "multi" button and a "quick" button...i dont have a "reply now" option either...at the bottom i have "post quick reply" and "go advanced"..at the top left corner i have a "reply" button, but it just takes me to the regular advanced reply screen...im sorry...i havent mastered the multiple quotes...i just dont know how to do it

Click to expand...

I wouldnt worry about it Sarah we came here to get high and converse.We arent being graded.Besides that you always get youre message across.As far as ashtray he picked his name good.Peace lady

sarah22 said:

sorry. im confused here...i have a "quote" button, and then a "multi" button and a "quick" button...i dont have a "reply now" option either...at the bottom i have "post quick reply" and "go advanced"..at the top left corner i have a "reply" button, but it just takes me to the regular advanced reply screen...im sorry...i havent mastered the multiple quotes...i just dont know how to do it

Click to expand...

My bad... herb + phone = nonsense


Okay so right under my post there should be a green button that says, "quote" and to the right of that (if ur logged in) there should be another button that has a pair of quotation marks and a plus sign, like below (mines not as fancy)

" " +

When you click that button it should turn blue, now do the same to another post on this thread. Now don't use the text box on the bottom to reply. Remember that quote button? Look all the way to the right of the page and there should be another button that says "reply now" that is directly across from the quote button, (below reply now should be the page links (like 1, 2, 3, 4)) when you have clicked those add quote buttons and clicked reply now you should see a text entry page with multiple quotes

Id just show u a pic and circle the buttons but like I said I'm doing this all from my phone...

Sr. Verde said:

My bad... herb + phone = nonsense


Okay so right under my post there should be a green button that says, "quote" and to the right of that (if ur logged in) there should be another button that has a pair of quotation marks and a plus sign, like below (mines not as fancy)

" " +

When you click that button it should turn blue, now do the same to another post on this thread. Now don't use the text box on the bottom to reply. Remember that quote button? Look all the way to the right of the page and there should be another button that says "reply now" that is directly across from the quote button, (below reply now should be the page links (like 1, 2, 3, 4)) when you have clicked those add quote buttons and clicked reply now you should see a text entry page with multiple quotes

Id just show u a pic and circle the buttons but like I said I'm doing this all from my phone...

Click to expand...

i think that we might be using different layouts...im using the blazin 07 layout...so i think that my "multi" button is probably the same as your " " button...i'll try to figure it all out. thank you for your help and thank you hydrotech for your reply as well!

Maybe its the herb man, Im just sayin. Have you tried layin off of it to see how you feel?

sarah22 said:

i think that we might be using different layouts...im using the blazin 07 layout...so i think that my "multi" button is probably the same as your " " button...i'll try to figure it all out. thank you for your help and thank you hydrotech for your reply as well!

Click to expand...

Yeah its the multi button, like multiple [quotes]

FUPAGUNT said:

Maybe its the herb man, Im just sayin. Have you tried layin off of it to see how you feel?

Click to expand...

Yeah whenever I do my depression gets way way worse

Although herb does bring out the skitzo in people I hear

No regrets on lighting up

damn verde, ive just like u in a way man i have a messed up heart too from all the stress ive had to deal with i get pains every day and its hurting right now too......also ive been locked up in one of those crazy houses too with the real sick people but for a bullshit reason where i got fuked over but its a long story....those fukers with the needles almost always make me pass out... anyway im still young probably like yourself... i feel your pain man.. peace

RC7 said:

damn verde, ive just like u in a way man i have a messed up heart too from all the stress ive had to deal with i get pains every day and its hurting right now too......also ive been locked up in one of those crazy houses too with the real sick people but for a bullshit reason where i got fuked over but its a long story....those fukers with the needles almost always make me pass out... anyway im still young probably like yourself... i feel your pain man.. peace

Click to expand...

I hate heart pain man



I'm starting to feel that crazy feeling again

Sr. Verde said:

Yeah its the multi button, like multiple [quotes]



Yeah whenever I do my depression gets way way worse

Although herb does bring out the skitzo in people I hear

No regrets on lighting up

Click to expand...

it wont cause psychosis in an otherwise mentally healthy individual...if you're predisposed to schizophrenia then yea, pot can act as a catalyst to bring forth more symptoms.

how much a day do you smoke? i used to feel spaced out a lot but not since i cut back to just once or twice a day...

sarah22 said:

it wont cause psychosis in an otherwise mentally healthy individual...if you're predisposed to schizophrenia then yea, pot can act as a catalyst to bring forth more symptoms.

how much a day do you smoke? i used to feel spaced out a lot but not since i cut back to just once or twice a day...

Click to expand...

Well, in the last three days

a .3 joint, 4 volcano bags, a few bong rips, and a bong rip of salvia



I'm that occasional smoker, I toke every now and then for fun, then when I'm chillin with friends and we want to get blasted we can do a quarter in a day and a half between two people



My thoughts are clear and concise, just, they're weird.

I know they're messed up and weird but to save my life I couldn't give you any examples at this moment. It's only when I feel a certain way that all the problems and thoughts come rushing back