MadNyeTheHydroGuy
Active Member
And it kind of ruined it for me. I had quit for 3 years for a career, which ironically ended when i smoked ONE TIME and a series of unfortunate unrelated events prompted a drug test. Started smoking again hard for like 6 months about then stopped for ANOTHER career which doesnt really test but could under certain curcumstances and im still gunshy from the first time. Anyway.
Ive kind of turned into a lame ass since i quit. I dont have any friends and im not interested in making any. Im uptight. Kind of hate everyone and everything. Outside of the times i quit for work, ive always been a pothead. But nowadays, there are occasional chances for me to smoke again, and on the very rare occasions i do, it just doesnt feel the way i remember. It makes me kind of uncomfortable, slightly paranoid like everyones looking at me and cross examining me. I dont feel like i belong in my own skin, and my gait is off. Its completely turned me off to smoking, which makes me sad. Now i just feel like im stuck between two worlds, and like i lost something special.
When i was in elementary school, i was really good at drawing. I would doodle all day all over my schoolwork, mostly pokemon and DBZ, but also original monsters and goofy faces or whatever. One of my teachers was really pissed over it and one day she came to my desk and called me out in front of the whole class, and told me if I doodled one more time, she would fail me. Thus scared and embarrased me, and i stopped, but it wasnt easy. I wanted to doodle so bad, but remembered what she said and had to force myself to stop. This made me lose all interest in drawing, and i eventually completely lost my ability. To this day, my art sucks, and i cant even think of anything to draw, much less put it on paper. If i do force myself its stressful and always sucks to me. Sometimes i cam draw ok for my kids, when im goofing around with them, but its still uncomfortable for me.
Smoking for me nowadays feels just like drawing. Has this ever happened to anyone? Did you ever get smoking to feel "right" again?
Ive kind of turned into a lame ass since i quit. I dont have any friends and im not interested in making any. Im uptight. Kind of hate everyone and everything. Outside of the times i quit for work, ive always been a pothead. But nowadays, there are occasional chances for me to smoke again, and on the very rare occasions i do, it just doesnt feel the way i remember. It makes me kind of uncomfortable, slightly paranoid like everyones looking at me and cross examining me. I dont feel like i belong in my own skin, and my gait is off. Its completely turned me off to smoking, which makes me sad. Now i just feel like im stuck between two worlds, and like i lost something special.
When i was in elementary school, i was really good at drawing. I would doodle all day all over my schoolwork, mostly pokemon and DBZ, but also original monsters and goofy faces or whatever. One of my teachers was really pissed over it and one day she came to my desk and called me out in front of the whole class, and told me if I doodled one more time, she would fail me. Thus scared and embarrased me, and i stopped, but it wasnt easy. I wanted to doodle so bad, but remembered what she said and had to force myself to stop. This made me lose all interest in drawing, and i eventually completely lost my ability. To this day, my art sucks, and i cant even think of anything to draw, much less put it on paper. If i do force myself its stressful and always sucks to me. Sometimes i cam draw ok for my kids, when im goofing around with them, but its still uncomfortable for me.
Smoking for me nowadays feels just like drawing. Has this ever happened to anyone? Did you ever get smoking to feel "right" again?
