As far as advice goes against getting addicted, you only have 2 choices. Do or dont abuse them. I was prescribed Morphine 30mg pills and Soma 350 mg and vicodin 10/500 among other crap for indigestion and sleep because of all the meds. Actually I believe some of it is mind over matter. I have myofacial pain syndrome and fibromyalgia, Whatever the fuc that all is. I was in so much pain the pills became easy to abuse...
its a simple equation. More pain=more pills.
But there is an end the that equation. They will stop working and you will become dependent on them as your pain is part psychological.
In essence the pills make your pain worse. When your on them the dependency makes you vulerable to needing instant relief.
I learned the hard way.
An aquaintance who was also supposedly in pain began to ask for my pills for quite a high price. He was willing to pay upwards of 5 bux a pill for the morphine. It boggled my mind due to the fact I ate 5x that many or more a day...Id eat 3 like candy and chew them.
After wondering about it I asked why they were so valuable to him, I said man I eat them all the time and you cant really even get high, you get constipated and sick before you feel good.
He said I dont eat them. He was cooking them in distilled in a spoon and sucking up the water leaving the gums and lactose or whatever behind...injecting this into his vein.
A clear path to pain relief was now introduced into my naive mind.
Pain will make you do insane things just for a moment of relief.
I saw my choice and made the wrong one, not for fun not for leisure not to be cool.
I did it so I could live a normal life and wake up like a normal man and feed my 3 children and clean my home and remain on a normal family regimine.
This soon changed. A 30 day supply was gone in days, the pain was more intense and severe and my life was not being lived right, withdrawal was like a thousand burning lights in my head, I wanted to cry, and laugh, I was cold and hot, I was angry and sad and mad, at the same time.
The pain was now looking like a more desired decision. The 2 choices can be very obvious or very secluded and sometimes people go off the peak, they go over the hill and dont come back. I was indeed one of the lucky ones who saw the error of my ways...I often wonder how close I was to not waking up, how close was I in my drug induced coma to fade away, to stop breathing?
This is not a lecture I could care less what you do, this is an experiance. I feel sad when I hear of someone dying from overdose because I see they were not strong enough to resist it, actually my best friend Wes just Died the 22nd of Oct of methadone OD.
He never saw it coming.
There is nothing anyone can say to prevent another human from doing something stupid or dangerous. But whether you call it weakness or ignorance or just plain stupid take this with you before you ever make the mistake..
Pain is something you can become accustomed to, death isnt.
I now just live with it and have found the strength to live for something else other than my own needs, this is what one must do. I live for my kids and my family and know the pain is just my motivation to get up in the morning like a normal daddy. Even if I must cry when they are not looking and soak in hot showers at 5am before they wake up...Ill do that instead rather than neglect them or my own health...then around 8 am everything appears normal...
Maybe before anyone gets addicted to any substance they should search out something else to live for, this will give you more motivation to live and get up every morning than any drug.
Live for something else not yourself.
