Political Satire

Roger A. Shrubber

Well-Known Member
Satire from The Borowitz Report
Fox News Announces Acquisition of Kevin McCarthy

By Andy Borowitz
February 23, 2023

NEW YORK (The Borowitz Report)—Fox News Channel announced that it has completed its acquisition of the Speaker of the House, Kevin McCarthy.



Boro-Kevin-Mc.jpg
Rupert Murdoch, the network’s majority owner, said that he was “delighted” by the purchase of McCarthy and noted that Fox had snapped him up at an attractively low price.

"It helped that there were no other bidders,” he said.

But, even as Fox moved McCarthy onto its corporate ledger, some Wall Street analysts predicted that the network would rue the day that it acquired the congressman.

“Kevin McCarthy will be Rupert Murdoch’s worst investment since MySpace,” one analyst said.
 

Roger A. Shrubber

Well-Known Member
you know, i just have to wonder at the gaping, glaring, glistening stupidity some people continue to show as their carefully crafted fantasies crash around them...
trump lost, big. then he lied, and others lied, and fucking moronic idiots believed them...
trump and the RRR (radical right republicans...think KKK but just slightly worse) continued to grift, and lie, and cause more problems...and fucking moronic idiots ate it up...
Now, as it's finally all starting to crash down around their ears (which are full of their own shit from having their heads up their asses),
They still continue to act as if any of the incredibly stupid lies they bought into were ever true. They were never true, but some people will go to the grave with their sensory organs full of their own shit, because they could never pull their heads out of their asses long enough to see the truth.
 

DIY-HP-LED

Well-Known Member
You must be heartbroken over foxnews, all those lies over all those years making republicans suckers and fools. Imagine the contempt Rupert must have for them to use them like toilet paper, just like Trump. It looks like it is gonna cost fox billions and Dominion are not alone in suing them over broadcasting bullshit, with the evidence dropping in court lots of people will have a foot in the door and a crack at Rupert's ass.
 

Roger A. Shrubber

Well-Known Member
You must be heartbroken over foxnews, all those lies over all those years making republicans suckers and fools. Imagine the contempt Rupert must have for them to use them like toilet paper, just like Trump. It looks like it is gonna cost fox billions and Dominion are not alone in suing them over broadcasting bullshit, with the evidence dropping in court lots of people will have a foot in the door and a crack at Rupert's ass.
He should be the first billionaire bandit taken down, but nowhere near the last...
 

doughper

Well-Known Member
I'm not sure where to post this. So, I just now moved this from "What
are you watching?" to here, where somebody might read it.
I just thought that the list of the Orange Demon's names
was good. And I threw in most of Kimmel's monologue with it. Enjoy:

Trump Was So Upset by Jimmy Kimmel’s Jokes His White House Staff Asked Disney to Censor Him


"...this article from Rolling Stone it says uh Trump White House pressured Disney to censor
Jimmy Kimmel. Now Disney is the company that owns ABC our Network and Jimmy
Kimmel is me so obviously I was interested in seeing what it was. But according to the story,
in 2018 Donald Trump who was at that time president of the United States was so upset about my
jokes that I made about him he directed his staffers at the White House to call Disney to tell them
to Reign me in.

The report says at least two calls were made from the Trump White House to quote convey the
president's anger regarding Kimmel's monologues and gems. In other words president Karen
demanded to speak to my manager. You'd think but I guess not. The article says news of these
calls spread around the corridors of power in Washington. wow

What a plot twist the first time Donald Trump ever tries to stop someone from talking about him
on television and it's me. Usually when he wants somebody to stop talking about him he pays them
a hundred thirty thousand dollars but he wanted me to do it for nothing. I wonder what it
was specifically that sparked this. His uh Trumper tantrum, I wonder what it was he found so
objectionable.

I don't know maybe it was the time I had Stormy Daniels look at a plate of carrots and
to size them up and she picked a little one. Maybe it was one of the nicknames uh I
uh like uh:


"Tani soprano goes for dumbass Emperor
Palpatini hands
Mar alardo
King tutankonman
The hydroxy Horror Picture Show
Pumpkin the corn Humper
Grab ass Grandpa
Orange Julius Caesar
Colludicrous flavios
Freddy Krueger
The tandalorian
Driver Woods cured on dictator talk."
Click to expand...
Give me ... I only have ... I only have a hundred more, okay:


"Quick Pro comb over
I'll go scam
Fiberace
The one Terminator
Chocolate Mussolini
YMCA hole
The recount of Monte Cristo
Daddy bone spurs or
George Washington,"
Click to expand...
... Maybe.

Wow what a fragile Little Snowflake. What a blowhard. He's a blowhard and a snowflake,
he's a blowflake is what he is. He should change the hats to say make America wine
again MAWA. Because when you think of all the people I regularly make fun of it's
a lot of people. The only two who tried to stop me are Donald Trump and Marjorie
Taylor Green, who actually called the cops on me. I made I made fun of OJ a
thousand times he hasn't tried to kill me once.

And this guy Donald Trump all he does is make fun of people. He makes fun of disabled journalists.
He makes fun ... he calls our veterans, veteran Prisoners of War. even "losers". He insults his
opponents, his friends, his family. But if I point out that he's so fat they renamed the plane
Air Force Wonder Bread, I'm the bad guy. You know what maybe this is why Donald
and Melania sleep in separate bedrooms, she was laughing too hard at my monologue at night.

Joking aside. this is a blatant abuse of power. I wonder if Fox News, who're always screaming
about censoring comedians, will they defend me on this? I doubt it. We have a First Amendment right
that Americans a hell of a lot braver than Donald Trump died for.

And especially hypocritical coming from someone who claims to be the biggest
anti-censorship defender of free speech.
Trump sound bites:

"Today I'm directing my Administration to explore all Regulatory and legislative
solutions to protect free speech and the Free Speech rights of all Americans.

"We're here today to discuss protecting Americans from censorship.

"We will uphold the right of free speech.

"We as a country cannot tolerate political censorship

"We will always always protect Free Speech

"The censorship and bias is a threat to Freedom itself
"Free speech is a Bedrock of American life

"We believe in free speech censorship

"Free Speech censorship

"Free Speech censorship

"Believe it or not I'm one that really likes Free Speech

"You can't have censorship You can't pick one person and
say well we don't like what he's been saying he's out."

It's very interesting again it's almost like it's ... almost like he's a hypocrite, you know.

You know what else is a shame, Jim Jordan just had his big Congressional hearing
on the weaponization of the federal government and I couldn't be there to
testify about a president of the United States who abused his authority to
silence someone who disagrees with him and tried to muzzle Free Speech. I'm so
sorry Jim. I would have been happy to help with that. And as for Trump, you
know if you want to come on the show to tell me to be quiet yourself. We still
have that arcade claw machine that My Pillow Guy got in. You may climb
inside and say whatever's on your delicate little mind. Okay?"


pillow guy.png
 

Django66

Well-Known Member
Let me be clear = I know better than you
Transparency = cover up
To keep you safe = control you
We come in peace = you better run or kill me where I stand.
Inclusion = racism
diversity = racism
Abortion = an issue used to divide us.
Gun Control = see to keep you safe. Also used to divide us.
Social media = antisocial behavior. (not always)

And that's all I have to say about that.
 
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