delvite
Well-Known Member
The Postal Service has issues new guidelines for employees wishing to shoot people in the workplace. Please check with your postal supervisor for more information.
The basic guidelines are as follows.
1) Only full time employees are allowed to commit shooting rampages in postal facilities.
2) All weapons used in post office shootings must be type-approved by the office of the postmaster General.
3) All weapons entering postal facilities must have proper postage affixed to them.
4) All bullets sent through the postal system or one of its facilities must have proper first class postage affixed to them. Failure to comply with this rule will result in returned bullets.
5) The USPS is not responsible for mangled or damaged bullets passing thorough its facilities.
6) All shootings must be pre-approved by your supervisor and be done while you are on an official break.
7) Employees involved in a shooting spree must stop immediately upon the end of their shift.
8.)Bulk bullet fire will receive a postage discount. Please check with the bulk mail department for more information.
9) Overnight delivery of bullet fire will not be accepted.
10) If an intended victim is not available, bullet delivery will be held until accepted with a signature. ID will be required.
Failure to comply with these rules will result in immediate
7-day suspension and possible dismissal pending a hearing.
The post office says they're raising the price of stamps by
one cent because they need to upgrade their equipment.
Apparently, they're going from semi-automatics to uzis.
remember to watch your ph pmsl.......................
