Only tears can express how sad I am.
He was hit by a car yesterday evening. I felt him up and he didn't feel or act like he had any broken bones. He was even standing on 4 feet when he came up in the yard. But I looked at his gums, which were too white. After goggling, i found it meant or could mean that he had internal bleeding.
I don't have the money to pay for a 1k or more vet bill for surgery. And i know sometimes they can recover from things. Animals, I mean.
I brought him inside last night. Put him in the bottom half of a dog house. I had sheets and stuff in it so he would be comfortable. He didn't act like he was in pain, just very lethargic.
He drank a little water at 1st but then wouldn't take any. I went to sleep around 12am on the couch with him next to it in his crate. I even made eye contact with him right before I fell asleep and he was still alive. I wish I would have stayed up to hold him when he passed.
I woke up at 4am from a very bad dream. You know how you can have a bad dream and be really upset about it yet its of something that wouldn't freak you out that much in real life? Thats the kind of dream it was. I thought about getting something to drink and almost didn't. When I got up I looked at him and I knew....
He was such a good dog. So loving. SO SO SO SO SO loving and sweet. He would have grown into a big ol lapdog. He was born in my bedroom.I was there through the whole process when his mother, brixy gave birth.
I buried him this morning.
There is no way I could tell this whole story to anyone without crying like a baby and I don't wanna do that in front of people so I'm telling y'all. You can't see me cry.
I wish I could tell him how sorry I am for letting this happen
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