So my wife is going to pack up tonight

AsbestosToast

AsbestosToast

Well-Known Member
Don't know what the situation is like now, and my condolences, but the most important factor here should be the kids. Speaking from experience as a kid of divorced parents, divorce is an extremely mentally traumatizing thing for kids, and studies are only recently being done to understand the lifelong consequences kids of divorce deal with. They may seem old enough to understand it, and maybe they are, but that doesn't mean it won't affect them. Hope everything works out.
 
chuckbane

chuckbane

New Member
matthew said:
My wife and I have been having problems for the past 3 months or so. Most of them sexual, neither of us are satisfied and I am the only one who wants to work on it. We had come to the verge of separating about 4 times and she never could actually do it and I hate seeing her cry. So late last night we go to bed and she is not "in the mood" (as usual) so I lay there for a little bit. My neck and back are killing me (fell off a roof a few years back) and I am out of bud so I figure WTF. Get up, go to my office and pulled up some "adult material", just about that time I hear someone breathing behind me. We sat and talked about it and neither of us is getting what we need (but I am the shmuck trying to figure out how to make it better). We both went back to bed (me with blue balls) and we talked a little more. My wife's mom is going out of town this weekend and her little brother and sister were going to stay with us (another long story but they are 18 and 14).

So this morning my wife decides that instead of the kids coming over here she is going to stay at her mom's house with them and then find a place to live after that. Another big problem here is that she is going to get the raw end of this deal. I make enough that if I was single I would be living the high life. Right now she does not work at all and goes to school full time, we live on my salary and have only had to dip into savings twice in about 5 months. That being said she drives a 06 model car, has a new iPhone, gets her hair done on a regular basis and I almost always break down and treat her to manicures and pedicures with extra cash I make. So even if she gets a part time gig there is no way she can afford rent, her car, her phone and food. She wants to move in with her mom (going through a divorce right now) but the second we got married her room got turned into a media room so there is literally not a bed for her. Apartment rent would eat all but about $5 of her income by itself so that is really out of the question.

I really do love the girl with all my heart and I would like to think she isn't going to screw me here (I am not going to say I KNOW she isn't because there are plenty of men out there who KNEW their wifes were faithful or honest who weren't.) So I am going to end up paying her car payment for her ($400 a month) till she gets out of school. On top of all this we borrowed a good chunk of cash (low 5 figures) for her to go to school. I know she will pay it back just because she really is a good person and has way more pride than that.

So to sum this sob story all up, we are both still very much in love but so incompatible its killing us both. We have tried counseling and my wife was very tight lipped and even more so when the guy brought up sex. At this point I do want to give the single life a try. I don't really want to date at this point but I do want to do what I want when I want and actually have some fucking cash.
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you dont need to worry about her financial situation. she is going to clean you out in the divorce. when a couple seperates and the woman lives off the man's salary he gets royally fucked because the income you make is both of yours. She will be compensated because the divorce is causing her to lose income (yours). i know this sounds fucked but i know how this works, and at leat here in canada you have to give your wife x amount of dollars for x amount of time to "compensate" for her lost wages.

getting married is always a foolish move. all that marriage means is that you are legally bound together, and that includes finacially. you dont need marriage to be in love and i hope you will learn that lesson from all this.
 
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