The dumbest shit you have ever done-Let's hear about it!

GreatwhiteNorth

Global Moderator
Staff member
I once told a friend after smoking a lot of pot(at a younger age 4 bowls of some really good shit was a lot), Dude, I hope we don't have hangovers in the morning. After sobering up, I realized, Damn that was the dumbest thing I've ever said.
If you've never had a cannabis hangover then you've not smoked as much as I have.
 

Tribby

New Member
2 weeks ago my gf and I got pretty ripped watching reruns of Lost, Netflix beotch! Went to make some food.. put a bunch of leftover shit on a pan, threw it in the oven. 20 min later I go to take it out of the oven but totally forget the concept of hot.. burnt the shit out of my hands and there is still chicken grease on our ceiling.
 

CoolDudeStuff

Active Member
Got me and my friends lost in A'dam, they kept telling me that I'm no good at map reading, but I insisted, so at some point we where lost. I showed them the map (the point had a canal next to it) and told them that we are here, but no water near us. So, nothing really, as Wiz said, "I've always been the cool guy".. :blsmoke:
 

d33p

Member
About a week ago my gf and I did candy shopping for Halloween. Butterfingers, kit kats, reeses....anyway, we smoke some medicine the next day and both of our sweet tooths act up. I start pillaging the cupboards, trashing the fridge, and can't find anything (seriously at least 10-20 minutes of looking) as I go to leave the kitchen to tell her we don't have anything...I see the giant bag of candy. "Babe, you know what the most awesome thing to remember when your stoned is? We have a fuck load of candy." Needless to say we shut the lights off tonight because we didn't have any candy for the trick or treaters.
 

insid33

Member
I once got ripped and went to the car wash. Where i proceeded to check the high pressure nozzle for hot water. It was cold. Took skin right off right now.
 

realllynow

New Member
smoked a bowl while driving and when i got done smoking i put the pipe on my lap. i got to the house, stepped out of the car and... SMASH!! The pipe slipped off of my lap and met my concrete garage floor.
 

Me & My friend

Well-Known Member
Got me and my friends lost in A'dam, they kept telling me that I'm no good at map reading, but I insisted, so at some point we where lost. I showed them the map (the point had a canal next to it) and told them that we are here, but no water near us. So, nothing really, as Wiz said, "I've always been the cool guy".. :blsmoke:
Must have smoked me brains out because me don't remember that.
 

Lurkdewitt

Well-Known Member
come on man. that's complete bullshit. anyone that knows how to drive a stick shift would know that story is bullshit.

If you're foot suddenly came off the clutch then you would have stalled the engine. After it stalls, the car would not lunge forward with enough energy to go through a brick wall, it would lunge forward for about three inches before it completely stopped and locked up.
Not even remotely true. I watched my sister put my moms Pontiac sunfire through our garage door when I was a kid, and I can drop the clutch in my jeep and it doesn't die lol.
 

clint308

Well-Known Member
Iwas baked as fuck the other night
got my self a lazy as dinner of hot baked beans , fried eggs and a cheese toastie with tobasco sauce all over it
Finished cookin , plated that shit up and walked to the lounge room
upon reaching the table i stumbled and tripped straight over the table
My dinner ended up all over the sofa
with me laying on top of it with my face in the hot beans with tobasco
I burnt the whole side of my face with the beans then burnt the fuck out of my eyes with tobasco
that shit stings so bad
 

CitrusGrower

Well-Known Member
Iwas baked as fuck the other night
got my self a lazy as dinner of hot baked beans , fried eggs and a cheese toastie with tobasco sauce all over it
Finished cookin , plated that shit up and walked to the lounge room
upon reaching the table i stumbled and tripped straight over the table
My dinner ended up all over the sofa
with me laying on top of it with my face in the hot beans with tobasco
I burnt the whole side of my face with the beans then burnt the fuck out of my eyes with tobasco
that shit stings so bad

thats a good one. made my eyes tear up
 

Balzac89

Undercover Mod
Second time I ever made brownies I decided to make them strong. The first batch was weak.

I cooked well over a pound of frost trimmings into a cup of oil for 12 hours. Then I proceeded to make a single batch of brownies.

I was stoned until I shit the brownie out a good 24 hours.
 

clint308

Well-Known Member
I was 16 going for a mechanics job working on forklifts
I had worked there as a cleaner every saturday for a few years , as my dad was forman there
I was asked to move a big container forklift out the roller door
I climbed up the ladder , sat in the drivers chair and started her up
Then started reversing out slowly , Then something in my fucking brain told me try out all 6 gears in reverse
I floored it and started shifting gears up
The BANG , It seemed like it lasted for ever
I didn't check the height of the roller door did i .
I took out the whole main roller door to the factory
I NEVER GOT THE JOB !!!!!!!!!!!!!
 

stoned n proud

New Member
(SRY ABOUT THE LENGTH OF THIS STORY BUT THATS EVERYTHING THAT I REMEMBER FROM THAT NIGHT)
(THIS IS A TRUE STORY)
The craziest shit i ever did in a night? thats a tuff one im sorta known where i live for having alotta fucked up nights with bros.
but the craziest one hands down was my sophomore year in highschool i had just turned 16 about a month or 2 ago. me and some stoner buddies decided we would have a crazy fri night out so lets begin.
so i just finished wakin n bakin a bowl to myself and my good friend chris comes over with a G so we packed 2 bowls and were feeling good as hell chilling in my basement on the couch untill he pulls this little baggy out of his pocket only its not bud. he pulled out a maze tab (synthetic LSD) this was back when i used to roll (take LSD) but not after this night. anyway he opens the bag then pulls out the little square piece of paper and sticks it under his tongue. after about 30 mins of us laphing uncontrolably then forgetting why we started lauphing. He swallowed it then about 20 mins later we decide to dip from my place and go for a journey (BAD IDEA NEVER GO OUT WHEN UR TRIPPING!) so we were walking down the side walk towards the neighboring community which isnt a gated or private community but just ur average neighborhood. we turn into the front entrance of this place cause we were heading to a park close by inside the community. I guess i should mention its been about an hour since chris dropped his acid so hes beginning to hallucinate a little like while we were walking he said the sidewalk is purple dude...NO! wait its blue no actually its purple. me looking at him a little worried thinking maybe i should get him and head back but he was already heavily tripping and my place was a good walk behind us. so i just took him to the park inside the community i mentioned earlier cause no one ever really goes there unless its for a drug deal.
Ok this is where the story begins getting fucked up. As we turn on our bikes into the community i notice 2 of my buddies across the street i say whatsup and try to keep moving but instead i hear car horns and screeching tires and brakes so as i turn around all i c a kid halling ass across 2 lanes of traffic after ditching his bike in the middle of the road and my first thought is fuck its chris. luckily no one was hurt and the cars kept rolling by and everyone was safe but i knew he was fucked up to pull a stunt like that. on the other side of the street now chris has started talking to my buddies Frankie who went to my school and saun who went to a different school in our district. so i finally get across and chris is lauphing hysterically/uncontrollably. Frankie then looks at me and says "u gotta get him somewhere safe now i could tell a mile away this kid is on something else thats not weed." so frankie and saun come along for this adventure now helping me walk chris to the park without it looking sketch. we finally get there and we let chris sit on the slide in the park to just let him zone out and have fun in his own world for a bit which gives me some time to relax and talk to frank and Shaun.As luck would have it turns out they are there to pick up a half O and i couldnt be happier. the "guy" they were picking up from was one of my good buddies from way back. we will call him brandon S. me being so much more happy and sorta high from the previous bowls from wake n bake i decided to throw down my 200$ i was gonna use to pick up anyway we didnt ask chris to throw down at all in fear he would go ham and hurt himself. or someone else. so were just chilling out waiting to get our 2 seperate half O'S and match when 2 kids stroll up on there long boards and it turns out its these 2 kids i met freshman year! they were my buds brandon R. and Justin who had a fresh pack of maralboro reds on him i bummed one and after he sall chris he gave him a cig and said "dude sit down calm down shut up and smoke this cig OK!?" chris sorta zoning in and out repeatedly. Eventually agreed after he understood what justin was saying. So he sat down calmed down a bit took 2 short drags put the cig down to answer his cell then forgot about the cig. I almost thought it was gonna be alright for chris cause it had been 2 and a half hours so i knew the "tripping" faze of the acid was just about over and the controllable stoned part of the LSD was coming.Then almost outta nowhere chris screams SHIT! everyone after telling him to SSSSHHHHH! asked whats wrong now? its his girlfriend calling him every one says the same thing DONT ANSWER! of course he does the opposite. He then goes through a solid hour of saying hey babe! then looking at me and forgetting all about his girl then remembering and saying hey BABE! 2 cigs and 30 mins later Brandon S. finally shows up on his BMX and the deal gets even sweater.He brought his bong and hes matching our 2 half O's with his own solid O he sells my buddy frank a fat half O of some high grade bud called Red wine i think or wine house something with the word wine in it (ha sry its been a while since i told this story!)
After that i come up too him give him my 200$ and he gives me a choice between what frank got or some medical grade shit smuggled over from cali by this one "guy" we both knew at the time.i asked him whats the name? he leans in close and says bluedream...
naturally i go head over heals and buy a half O of it. this is the best part too when we get to smoke! so we go to the other end of the neighborhood towards the local baking spot nicknamed "The Forest"
I would talk about the trip there but its loooonnngggg so heres the highlights chris got rowdy i sat him down on a bench and called my buddy Elliot who actually went to Shauns school too so he could help me with chris i told him id smoke him up till he was as high as a kite. That was the fastest anybody ever got across town to meet up with me he got there in like 10 mins. Anyway

Heres where it gets FUCKED UP so we finally make to the forest we sit in a circle of 7 kids and everyone had there piece on them we packed 2 diff bubblers 1 chillum 3 different bowls (mine included) and a brand new bong Bandon S. just got the other day that ripped better than heaven.
so after about an hour everyone is stoned to the max i have about a between an 8th and a quad left in my bag frankie has like 4 or 5 Gs left and it REAKS of bud. chris is literally just gone at this point.
(SPOILER ALERT! THIS WHERE THE COPS COME IN TO THE PICTURE!) (SPOILER ALERT! THIS WHERE THE COPS COME IN TO THE PICTURE!)
(SPOILER ALERT! THIS WHERE THE COPS COME IN TO THE PICTURE!) (SPOILER ALERT! THIS WHERE THE COPS COME IN TO THE PICTURE!)
So our whole group of 7 stoners just stroll outta the forest like its nobodies business at this point im fuckin baked with my head in the clouds it wasnt too late but it was definitely getting dark the sun was just about to set from what i remember. So we are walking down this bike trail cause we didnt wanna take the sidewalk on the main rode because we reaked of bud and everyones eyes were just cherry pit red. also it was a faster way back to my place so i could let chris whos tripping MAJOR BALLS on acid and about an ounce of pot sit down and relax for a min.
Anyway were all on the trail all 7 of us stoned as fuck and i notice an old man probably early or mid 60s walking his dog and talking to his wife. comming towards us just walking.
so naturally we move to the rite side of the bike trail to let them have some space to walk by. but as they come by they stop and say r u ok son? i turn. chris whos tripping his face off on the maze tabs (local "synthetic" LSD. not real LSD) and the O of medical grade shit is just laying down w/arms behind his head in the middle of the trail. Me quickley thinking i grab chris by the arm and say outloud "com'on dude dont be messing around with these nice people stop joking already!" as i get him closer i whisper in his ear "PEOPLE ACT STRAIGHT!" and thats when it all went down hill. Chris tweaks out screaming theres people here! run! he punched the old man rite in the face and he went DOWN LIKE A ROCK into the grass luckily rather than pavement. he gets up looks at me and says whats"your NAME!" me so stoned i just go blank for a sec.
HELLO 911 MY HUSBAND WAS JUST ASSAULTED SEND HELP! is what i zone back in just in time too hear. As i turn too hall ass outta there my whole group of 7 SPLIT like butter! i grabbed chris by the shoulder and sayd CHRIS FOLLOW ME NOW! me just pumping on adrenaline at the moment ran faster than i ever have b4 in my entire life i caught up to frankie and shaun who werent too far ahead as i look over my shoulder i c one guy chasing chris down and he barely gets away from the guy by running through the street and missing 2 cars by a hair any closer he woulda died i kid u not. but the driver in the right lane swerved into the other lane hitting a dodge ram parked infront of somebodys house HEAD ON at about 20 or 30 MPH i go back grab chris's hand and run,run,run is all i could think of.
After about a block i said
"chris follow me closely!" he said OK LUKE! i start sprinting frankie and shaun are gone and im hoping to god chris is behind me.
i ketch up too 2 of my friends outta the group of 7 i started out with its Elliot and Bandon S. who had another ounce in his bag with his bong and it smelled. i said thank GOD i found u guys lets go! i was running so fast i was going as fast as brandon who was on his BMX bike at the time. We started cutting through backyards because when we were almost at the community entrance/exit on to the main rode with the sidewalk i took to the park we heard sirens and sall lights around the corner .Then while we were booking it brandon had to hide his bike in some pine trees cause he couldnt get over the fence with it while we were cutting through the backyards.
With UNBELIEVABLE LUCK we ditched the cops but the chase wasnt over yet. As we were coming around a second time to the exit with the sidewalk that i sall frank and shaun on. its me elliot and brandon with the bong it was DARK out. And then i realized WHERES CHRIS!? i was about to just freak when DING! i just got a txt from Elliot who was litteraly nxt to me which i new that meant bad news i opened the txt and all it said was "undercover cop car behind us (black)" i couldnt believe it so i pretended to bend down to tie my shoes as i glance over my shoulder sure enough theirs an all black car with tinted windows and a little laptop light in the center of the 2 front seats was creepin on us very slowly too. i stand back up to start walking and act casual we turn onto the sidewalk leading back to my house.
i remember how desperatley i really didnt want the cop to c where i live cause they hadent seen my face yet that night i had a hat on with my hoodie worn over it so u couldnt see my face. and as we were walking down the side walk i heard a car door open and my only thought was
FUCK
it was the undercover cop but as he put one foot on the ground i thought i had heard fireworks for a second it was 2 pops and everybody us 3 stoners and cop included just stared back to the area we were just in. within the community then i heard the radio in the cops car go
SHOTS FIRED IN THE HOUSE WE NEED BACK! i didnt hear the rest cause the cop had close the door done a burn out and started halling ass towards the shots. the 3 of us just staired at each other speechless. we all silently agreed theres no way that was chris Just no way
and what really freaked me out we were walking down the sidewalk 3 SUV cop cars go by halling ass sirens blaring, lights blinding going atleast 60 MPH on a road where the speed limit was 45MPH. We got back to my place and everyone was just in shock for like 30 mins and then i got a call on my house phone around 11:30 at night.
it was the police and the first question was "hello is this (CENCORED NAME) i answered yes
the immediate follow up Question was were you with mr Chris (CENCORED LAST NAME) now i have no idea how i was this fucking lucky considering how stoned i was the only reason i could focus at all was cause of the adrenaline rush i had going. on the spot i said yes i was earlier today he came over and then we met up with some of my old friends Elliot and Brandon. COP: are you with mr.brandon and elliot now?
ME:no chris split up from us around 3 we came back here around 5:00 maybe 5:30 they left about 2 or 3 hours ago.
ME:how come is everything OK?
COP:yes yes everything is under control chris just seems to be under the influence of something here
ME: oh my gosh! well i...is he ok?
COP:yes everything is fine you clearly werent present for anything we were wondering. Thank you for your cooperation mr. (CENCORED NAME) have a good night.
ME:ok thanks goodnight sir.
i couldnt believe it i walked down to the basement and told them how i just bullshitted a cop while totally shitfaced and saved all our asses from this fucked up night in less then a 5 min convorsation over the phone with a police officer who was on the spot.
to celibrate we smoked the last O we had in brandons bag with the bong.
The nxt day Brandon and Elliot went home and i found out the fireworks i thought i heard cause i was stoned i learned about what happenned to chris frankie and shaun.
chris tried to break into 4 cars thinking they were his after that he attempted to break into 2 house luckily frankie grabbed chris and walked him by hand. when frankie and shaun were walking chris bailed cause of the cop sirens and ran into somebodys garage screaming i dont give a fuck! he broke in and cops started screeching up about 5 mins later he said. he sall full sirens and shit he could see cause luckily he got into his friends pick up truck and was peeking but he was trying to reach me the whole time like crazy but my phone was on silent after elliot txted me anyway
Frankie said the cops pulled up acting like they were in complete control there was like 15 cop cars on the street there was cop lights and everything then the neighbors started coming out and out of no where *POP!* *POP!*
The neighbors started freaking and it was total havoc.
while at school the nxt mon because i had 2 friends that lived on the street that the police swarmed like bees. mike and joe i learned from them chris broke into a police officers home and not just any cop the guy was the chief of police at the time. i heard chris was throwing dishes and braking windows screaming where am i! and he ended up finding the cops standard issue pistol but the officer wrestled him down and 2 rounds fired off in the kitchen luckily the officers family was outta town and no one got shot because he new how to handle the situation.
the following weekend i heard from chris and he got lucky as a MUTHERFUCKER! the particular cop he fought told chris he wasnt pressing charges because he said when he was chris's age he smoked and did alotta acid so he knew where he was coming from.

TRUE STORY NO BULLSHIT
even today every time i tell this story i am reminded how absolutley lucky beyond belief i was that night.
one more thing im reminded of is literally a week later a girl uptown took a maze tab (SYNTHETIC LSD) and died from the chemical reactions it caused in here brain.

(XTRA TIP FROM XPERIENCE)
dont fuck around with drugs that u dont know alot about or are worried could harm u.
Always have some background knowledge on the chemical that ur putting in ur body.
No high ur gonna get out of it is worth going through shit like this or even dying over.
 

MickFly

New Member
Well this is the first time i ever felt really embarrassed in public, nothing super crazy though.

Me and my other three friends had just decided to go to a movie and then to a hockey game our highschool was playing in. So my friends had told me to bring the booze i had recently bought so we could drink a little before just to have fun which i didn't object to because it didn't seem like a bad idea. So i bring the booze and im the only one drinking all the way up to until we get to the movie theater. We get there and i was definetly not hammered drunk but not sober either. So i watch the movie whatever thats ok, and we come out and my other buddy wants to drink as well so i just hand him the booze. He drinks a good amount so i naturally think alright well i better drink some more too. What i think went wrong in this situation was i didn't realize how drunk i was getting (which is why i always hate drinking out of fucking bottles). So pretty much what i do remember of that hockey game is that we got there, sat down, i got up and went outside. got stopped by cops took a breathalizer and then walked into the stadium with a friend who came to get me from inside. Now in my drunk head i THOUGHT nothing had gone wrong, cool. But when i get up the next morning after getting back i realized, wow that was fucking stupid i probably got a minor. so i check my pockets and sure enough found the god damn citation in my pocket. Now i had gotten over that but the only embarrassing thing was i had A CROWD OF PEOPLE WATCHING ME. There i was just sitting there hammer'd at the game and was like dozing off which is what i do for some reason when i get too drunk and all these little kids are just watching me fade off, laughing and just pointing at me. So yeah just embarrassing mostly which is alot shittier to me than some cop giving me a citation.
 

WhiteRhino9

Member
(SRY ABOUT THE LENGTH OF THIS STORY BUT THATS EVERYTHING THAT I REMEMBER FROM THAT NIGHT)
(THIS IS A TRUE STORY)
The craziest shit i ever did in a night? thats a tuff one im sorta known where i live for having alotta fucked up nights with bros.
but the craziest one hands down was my sophomore year in highschool i had just turned 16 about a month or 2 ago. me and some stoner buddies decided we would have a crazy fri night out so lets begin.
so i just finished wakin n bakin a bowl to myself and my good friend chris comes over with a G so we packed 2 bowls and were feeling good as hell chilling in my basement on the couch untill he pulls this little baggy out of his pocket only its not bud. he pulled out a maze tab (synthetic LSD) this was back when i used to roll (take LSD) but not after this night. anyway he opens the bag then pulls out the little square piece of paper and sticks it under his tongue. after about 30 mins of us laphing uncontrolably then forgetting why we started lauphing. He swallowed it then about 20 mins later we decide to dip from my place and go for a journey (BAD IDEA NEVER GO OUT WHEN UR TRIPPING!) so we were walking down the side walk towards the neighboring community which isnt a gated or private community but just ur average neighborhood. we turn into the front entrance of this place cause we were heading to a park close by inside the community. I guess i should mention its been about an hour since chris dropped his acid so hes beginning to hallucinate a little like while we were walking he said the sidewalk is purple dude...NO! wait its blue no actually its purple. me looking at him a little worried thinking maybe i should get him and head back but he was already heavily tripping and my place was a good walk behind us. so i just took him to the park inside the community i mentioned earlier cause no one ever really goes there unless its for a drug deal.
Ok this is where the story begins getting fucked up. As we turn on our bikes into the community i notice 2 of my buddies across the street i say whatsup and try to keep moving but instead i hear car horns and screeching tires and brakes so as i turn around all i c a kid halling ass across 2 lanes of traffic after ditching his bike in the middle of the road and my first thought is fuck its chris. luckily no one was hurt and the cars kept rolling by and everyone was safe but i knew he was fucked up to pull a stunt like that. on the other side of the street now chris has started talking to my buddies Frankie who went to my school and saun who went to a different school in our district. so i finally get across and chris is lauphing hysterically/uncontrollably. Frankie then looks at me and says "u gotta get him somewhere safe now i could tell a mile away this kid is on something else thats not weed." so frankie and saun come along for this adventure now helping me walk chris to the park without it looking sketch. we finally get there and we let chris sit on the slide in the park to just let him zone out and have fun in his own world for a bit which gives me some time to relax and talk to frank and Shaun.As luck would have it turns out they are there to pick up a half O and i couldnt be happier. the "guy" they were picking up from was one of my good buddies from way back. we will call him brandon S. me being so much more happy and sorta high from the previous bowls from wake n bake i decided to throw down my 200$ i was gonna use to pick up anyway we didnt ask chris to throw down at all in fear he would go ham and hurt himself. or someone else. so were just chilling out waiting to get our 2 seperate half O'S and match when 2 kids stroll up on there long boards and it turns out its these 2 kids i met freshman year! they were my buds brandon R. and Justin who had a fresh pack of maralboro reds on him i bummed one and after he sall chris he gave him a cig and said "dude sit down calm down shut up and smoke this cig OK!?" chris sorta zoning in and out repeatedly. Eventually agreed after he understood what justin was saying. So he sat down calmed down a bit took 2 short drags put the cig down to answer his cell then forgot about the cig. I almost thought it was gonna be alright for chris cause it had been 2 and a half hours so i knew the "tripping" faze of the acid was just about over and the controllable stoned part of the LSD was coming.Then almost outta nowhere chris screams SHIT! everyone after telling him to SSSSHHHHH! asked whats wrong now? its his girlfriend calling him every one says the same thing DONT ANSWER! of course he does the opposite. He then goes through a solid hour of saying hey babe! then looking at me and forgetting all about his girl then remembering and saying hey BABE! 2 cigs and 30 mins later Brandon S. finally shows up on his BMX and the deal gets even sweater.He brought his bong and hes matching our 2 half O's with his own solid O he sells my buddy frank a fat half O of some high grade bud called Red wine i think or wine house something with the word wine in it (ha sry its been a while since i told this story!)
After that i come up too him give him my 200$ and he gives me a choice between what frank got or some medical grade shit smuggled over from cali by this one "guy" we both knew at the time.i asked him whats the name? he leans in close and says bluedream...
naturally i go head over heals and buy a half O of it. this is the best part too when we get to smoke! so we go to the other end of the neighborhood towards the local baking spot nicknamed "The Forest"
I would talk about the trip there but its loooonnngggg so heres the highlights chris got rowdy i sat him down on a bench and called my buddy Elliot who actually went to Shauns school too so he could help me with chris i told him id smoke him up till he was as high as a kite. That was the fastest anybody ever got across town to meet up with me he got there in like 10 mins. Anyway

Heres where it gets FUCKED UP so we finally make to the forest we sit in a circle of 7 kids and everyone had there piece on them we packed 2 diff bubblers 1 chillum 3 different bowls (mine included) and a brand new bong Bandon S. just got the other day that ripped better than heaven.
so after about an hour everyone is stoned to the max i have about a between an 8th and a quad left in my bag frankie has like 4 or 5 Gs left and it REAKS of bud. chris is literally just gone at this point.
(SPOILER ALERT! THIS WHERE THE COPS COME IN TO THE PICTURE!) (SPOILER ALERT! THIS WHERE THE COPS COME IN TO THE PICTURE!)
(SPOILER ALERT! THIS WHERE THE COPS COME IN TO THE PICTURE!) (SPOILER ALERT! THIS WHERE THE COPS COME IN TO THE PICTURE!)
So our whole group of 7 stoners just stroll outta the forest like its nobodies business at this point im fuckin baked with my head in the clouds it wasnt too late but it was definitely getting dark the sun was just about to set from what i remember. So we are walking down this bike trail cause we didnt wanna take the sidewalk on the main rode because we reaked of bud and everyones eyes were just cherry pit red. also it was a faster way back to my place so i could let chris whos tripping MAJOR BALLS on acid and about an ounce of pot sit down and relax for a min.
Anyway were all on the trail all 7 of us stoned as fuck and i notice an old man probably early or mid 60s walking his dog and talking to his wife. comming towards us just walking.
so naturally we move to the rite side of the bike trail to let them have some space to walk by. but as they come by they stop and say r u ok son? i turn. chris whos tripping his face off on the maze tabs (local "synthetic" LSD. not real LSD) and the O of medical grade shit is just laying down w/arms behind his head in the middle of the trail. Me quickley thinking i grab chris by the arm and say outloud "com'on dude dont be messing around with these nice people stop joking already!" as i get him closer i whisper in his ear "PEOPLE ACT STRAIGHT!" and thats when it all went down hill. Chris tweaks out screaming theres people here! run! he punched the old man rite in the face and he went DOWN LIKE A ROCK into the grass luckily rather than pavement. he gets up looks at me and says whats"your NAME!" me so stoned i just go blank for a sec.
HELLO 911 MY HUSBAND WAS JUST ASSAULTED SEND HELP! is what i zone back in just in time too hear. As i turn too hall ass outta there my whole group of 7 SPLIT like butter! i grabbed chris by the shoulder and sayd CHRIS FOLLOW ME NOW! me just pumping on adrenaline at the moment ran faster than i ever have b4 in my entire life i caught up to frankie and shaun who werent too far ahead as i look over my shoulder i c one guy chasing chris down and he barely gets away from the guy by running through the street and missing 2 cars by a hair any closer he woulda died i kid u not. but the driver in the right lane swerved into the other lane hitting a dodge ram parked infront of somebodys house HEAD ON at about 20 or 30 MPH i go back grab chris's hand and run,run,run is all i could think of.
After about a block i said
"chris follow me closely!" he said OK LUKE! i start sprinting frankie and shaun are gone and im hoping to god chris is behind me.
i ketch up too 2 of my friends outta the group of 7 i started out with its Elliot and Bandon S. who had another ounce in his bag with his bong and it smelled. i said thank GOD i found u guys lets go! i was running so fast i was going as fast as brandon who was on his BMX bike at the time. We started cutting through backyards because when we were almost at the community entrance/exit on to the main rode with the sidewalk i took to the park we heard sirens and sall lights around the corner .Then while we were booking it brandon had to hide his bike in some pine trees cause he couldnt get over the fence with it while we were cutting through the backyards.
With UNBELIEVABLE LUCK we ditched the cops but the chase wasnt over yet. As we were coming around a second time to the exit with the sidewalk that i sall frank and shaun on. its me elliot and brandon with the bong it was DARK out. And then i realized WHERES CHRIS!? i was about to just freak when DING! i just got a txt from Elliot who was litteraly nxt to me which i new that meant bad news i opened the txt and all it said was "undercover cop car behind us (black)" i couldnt believe it so i pretended to bend down to tie my shoes as i glance over my shoulder sure enough theirs an all black car with tinted windows and a little laptop light in the center of the 2 front seats was creepin on us very slowly too. i stand back up to start walking and act casual we turn onto the sidewalk leading back to my house.
i remember how desperatley i really didnt want the cop to c where i live cause they hadent seen my face yet that night i had a hat on with my hoodie worn over it so u couldnt see my face. and as we were walking down the side walk i heard a car door open and my only thought was
FUCK
it was the undercover cop but as he put one foot on the ground i thought i had heard fireworks for a second it was 2 pops and everybody us 3 stoners and cop included just stared back to the area we were just in. within the community then i heard the radio in the cops car go
SHOTS FIRED IN THE HOUSE WE NEED BACK! i didnt hear the rest cause the cop had close the door done a burn out and started halling ass towards the shots. the 3 of us just staired at each other speechless. we all silently agreed theres no way that was chris Just no way
and what really freaked me out we were walking down the sidewalk 3 SUV cop cars go by halling ass sirens blaring, lights blinding going atleast 60 MPH on a road where the speed limit was 45MPH. We got back to my place and everyone was just in shock for like 30 mins and then i got a call on my house phone around 11:30 at night.
it was the police and the first question was "hello is this (CENCORED NAME) i answered yes
the immediate follow up Question was were you with mr Chris (CENCORED LAST NAME) now i have no idea how i was this fucking lucky considering how stoned i was the only reason i could focus at all was cause of the adrenaline rush i had going. on the spot i said yes i was earlier today he came over and then we met up with some of my old friends Elliot and Brandon. COP: are you with mr.brandon and elliot now?
ME:no chris split up from us around 3 we came back here around 5:00 maybe 5:30 they left about 2 or 3 hours ago.
ME:how come is everything OK?
COP:yes yes everything is under control chris just seems to be under the influence of something here
ME: oh my gosh! well i...is he ok?
COP:yes everything is fine you clearly werent present for anything we were wondering. Thank you for your cooperation mr. (CENCORED NAME) have a good night.
ME:ok thanks goodnight sir.
i couldnt believe it i walked down to the basement and told them how i just bullshitted a cop while totally shitfaced and saved all our asses from this fucked up night in less then a 5 min convorsation over the phone with a police officer who was on the spot.
to celibrate we smoked the last O we had in brandons bag with the bong.
The nxt day Brandon and Elliot went home and i found out the fireworks i thought i heard cause i was stoned i learned about what happenned to chris frankie and shaun.
chris tried to break into 4 cars thinking they were his after that he attempted to break into 2 house luckily frankie grabbed chris and walked him by hand. when frankie and shaun were walking chris bailed cause of the cop sirens and ran into somebodys garage screaming i dont give a fuck! he broke in and cops started screeching up about 5 mins later he said. he sall full sirens and shit he could see cause luckily he got into his friends pick up truck and was peeking but he was trying to reach me the whole time like crazy but my phone was on silent after elliot txted me anyway
Frankie said the cops pulled up acting like they were in complete control there was like 15 cop cars on the street there was cop lights and everything then the neighbors started coming out and out of no where *POP!* *POP!*
The neighbors started freaking and it was total havoc.
while at school the nxt mon because i had 2 friends that lived on the street that the police swarmed like bees. mike and joe i learned from them chris broke into a police officers home and not just any cop the guy was the chief of police at the time. i heard chris was throwing dishes and braking windows screaming where am i! and he ended up finding the cops standard issue pistol but the officer wrestled him down and 2 rounds fired off in the kitchen luckily the officers family was outta town and no one got shot because he new how to handle the situation.
the following weekend i heard from chris and he got lucky as a MUTHERFUCKER! the particular cop he fought told chris he wasnt pressing charges because he said when he was chris's age he smoked and did alotta acid so he knew where he was coming from.

TRUE STORY NO BULLSHIT
even today every time i tell this story i am reminded how absolutley lucky beyond belief i was that night.
one more thing im reminded of is literally a week later a girl uptown took a maze tab (SYNTHETIC LSD) and died from the chemical reactions it caused in here brain.

(XTRA TIP FROM XPERIENCE)
dont fuck around with drugs that u dont know alot about or are worried could harm u.
Always have some background knowledge on the chemical that ur putting in ur body.
No high ur gonna get out of it is worth going through shit like this or even dying over.
That is an absolutely amazing story!!! Not gonna lie, longest thing I have ever read in my life... but it has inspired me to roll up another and to congratulate you on your great luck!!! :bigjoint:
 

sufc8t1

Well-Known Member
When I lived with my parents(age 14/15),my girlfriend came over whilst they were out.
We had a little drink and a smoke,and before you know it,we were banging.(them were the days lmao.
Anyways....
So we are getting jiggy,and hear the front door go(bare in mind we are at it in the living room lol)
SHIT!
We both stop what we where doing,and proceed to run around like headless chickens trying frantically to find/put our clothes on.(slightly drunk and baked too)
In the madness we both manage somehow to crack our heads together(I gaind a big lump on my head,whilst she received a chipped tooth)
We just about manage to get things together before my Mom/Dad and younger brother and sis walk in."Few!" I think.Got away with it,so we quickly made our excuses and decided to head out the house(not wanting my mum to su out the fact we were drunk.stoned and been fucking! lol)
So anyway...
As we are out I realise "SHIT! the johny!"(condom lol)"Where the fuck did I put the johny!"
So all night long im stressing about walking in,and being presented with a part used condom by my mother!(as far as she was aware,I didn't even know what sex was lol)
I remember being sat outside my house for hours,trying to raise the courage to walk in to an almost certain battering by my Mom.
So the plan is,,sneak in,go to toilet(by this time im nearly pissing my pants,having been out all these hours)and quickly get in bed.
So I go in,sneak to the toilet,and lo and behold,whats sat on my flacid dick?you got it,a wrinkled up johny!
I kid you not,me and my girlfriend was almost having heart attacks with stress all night long,and for some reason,it never even dawned on me,it had been sat on my dick all along!lol
 
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