Random Jabber Jibber thread

Did you know that all women really love anal? It's just that most men fuck it up. use lube, take your time, ease it in and wait..DON'T MOVE... after a while you can fuck it like it's a pussy. Makes chicks cum hella hard, some girls even cum during the "DON'T MOVE" phase. anal should be enjoyable for everyone. That's how I feel about that.
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Reminds me of a CL posting I did a couple of months ago.

You Dipped Your Chocolate in My Peanut Butter - w4m
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And by that I mean you put your D in my A. I didn't want to do it, but you were so convincing. I pooped a little and you freaked out. Clearly it was your first time too. Some talker. I googled it and that's actually fairly normal. What I don't understand is why you didn't just shower instead of jumping up and throwing your pants on then kicking my cat on your rush out. I hope your pants stunk all the way home and you caught a cold from driving with your window down. If you ever see me again, do NOT talk to me. F you.


I got at least 50 emails from guys offering to do it right for me.
 
We had some showers through the night was pretty much dry outside by break of day. I'm sure my lawn appreciated it.

I do not water my lawn.
It stares up at where its life comes from.
when I can not even lift my head, my lawn stares up at where its food will come from long after I am gone. Almost all the grass is dead. But those that remain, look up at the sky.
That is beautiful. You have a gift.
 
My mom keeps telling me I need to "come back to Jesus". I don;t know where he is. I keep looking in the bottom of my alcohol bottles, but I don;t see him. Why are some people lucky enough to find Jesus at the bottom of their bottle? I want to be lucky at least once in my fucking life. Although, I prefer it to be at something else.
 
My mom keeps telling me I need to "come back to Jesus". I don;t know where he is. I keep looking in the bottom of my alcohol bottles, but I don;t see him. Why are some people lucky enough to find Jesus at the bottom of their bottle? I want to be lucky at least once in my fucking life. Although, I prefer it to be at something else.

We have our daughter at a "Christian" preschool because it's the cheapest in town by far and that's where all the Chinese kids go. They just told me today when I dropped her off that she should register again for next year because they feel she's not ready for kindergarten because she missed 7 weeks going to China. Pretty sure she learned more about the world in those 7 weeks than she did the whole semester. I found Jesus, in my direct debit account!
 
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