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There are two muffins in the oven. First muffin says "fuck it's hot in here" The second muffin responds "HOLY SHIT A TALKING MUFFIN!!!!"

Wooot woot!!! I got a 30 cent raise today. And I am HIGH AS A FUCKING KITE!!!!!!!!! bongsmiliebongsmiliebongsmilie:bigjoint::joint::eyesmoke: Omg my boy hooked me up and gave me at least an 1/8th of purple dank and only charged me $30. Downside though is that I'm chatty high and there's...

I'm pretty sure the guy that ran me over was high... j/s

My penis is 4.5" hard, tattooed to say "I <3" and I have stamina for Days. It usually takes me 2 hours to get off. It also does this weird thing, where when I'm soft the skin rolls over the head to look like I'm uncut. That's why I started shaving my pubes. They'd get caught in the skin and be...

Haha, because if I were to have gig money to save it damn sure wouldn't be going to her and her toys. There's an LTD Warwick Vampyre with my name on it somewhere out there. The Mercury is a POS with over 200K miles on it, a wrecked front bumper, and rust on the rear driver's wheel well. I mean...

Soooo my wife decided to see things my way about getting new bass gear. She's still on the fence about the bass but has Okayed that Cabinet on payments. Says it depends on where we stand when my income tax/paycheck comes in. Also she wants me to trade in my Old Mercury so she can buy a new...

It was an online college. One of the disadvantages of not having a driver's license is that you're very, very limited in everything you do. (I didn't get my license until last November. I'm 26)...

Yeah she actually passed right after we made the appointment at the vet. Poor girl, but she lived a LONG and healthy life for a puppy. I think the peeping tom wanted to get the dogs taken away so he could break in. That'd be my guess, but where I used to live the crackheads were more rampant...

It's easier to know what understand reviews when you know what to look for. It was an 2 year degree that was supposed to take 2-4 years depending on whether it was full time or part time. I say it was a scam because after I enrolled the "teachers" were no help. I'd ask for assistance and they'd...

Fair enough. Scientific method is one action that can be used in some aspects of adult life, even if it is rarely applied. I'll even give you the benefit of the doubt and say more often than I'd realize, possibly using it for basic troubleshooting without actually knowing that I'm going...

I used to watch that show a lot. Chumlee is a dick IMO. "Big Hoss" is the same way. Rick and the "Old Man" are alright I guess. The "history" lessons on some of the stuff the bring in can be kind of interesting. I wonder how much of it is actually true. Aside from that aspect though there...

I graduated in the top % of my class. Not valedictorian mind you, but I was a straight A student from beginning to end (until I ended up in college, which my "education" did not prepare me for) Now you are more then welcome to try again... or you can continue to make an ass out of yourself...

Had a similar instance happen with another shepherd that we used to own. Girl named Gabby. We had her lead tied to the front porch and had her outside so she could go potty and get some fresh air. Next thing you know a cop comes over wanting to ask some questions about someone in the...

What is the point of education then if not to help develop minds into becoming productive adults? Early exposure to the fundamentals of all forms of education is needed, the last 4 years of school should be geared more towards educating children into becoming functioning adults. Considering that...

I rely on the school to educate children into being productive members of society, not to just push useless material on them in order keep up funding. I'm not blaming school for lack of direction, I'm blaming them for lack of proper education. Like I've said before a true education is not...

Not trying to pick a fight either, just trying to help you understand that even though shakespeare might be interesting and even somewhat enlightening, it has no practical use in becoming a productive member of today's society. "today is witch's time of night, where grave's in cemeteries open...

Then go back and watch the video and educate yourself. First line few lines "I wasn't taught how to get a job, but I can remember dissecting a frog. I don't wasn't taught how to pay tax, but I know loads about shakespeare's classics" - tell me out of those 4 which 2 would be useful information...

I don't the think his message "Don't stay in school" is supposed to be taken literal. More along the lines of "what's the point if they won't teach us anything that we can actually use?" I agree with him on everything though. After 12 years of school the only parts I remember are Reading...

My wife used to have a German Shepherd named Lex. Some POS tried to break into her house (this was before we met) and Lex made a nice meal out of the bastards arm. Now we have 3 dogs. 2 yappy Dachshund mixes and a Wolf/Shepherd mix. The Dachshund mixes are more likely to bite then the wolf...