Dealing with loss...

Last night I got some of the most terrible news. I found out that I had lost a child and it hurt. I just want to know how everyone else who has had something like this happen coped with it. Drinking a fifth and a pint plusabout ten beers definitely didn't do him justice but with no meds it was an easy way to release what I was holding back and a 26 year old man who values being mentally and physically strong balled and balled while playing bone thugs crossroads.

Sorry for your loss. No idea how I would deal with such a thing. I imagine others close to you are feeling the loss as well. Being strong for them is perhaps how you'll get through is. Positive thoughts your way.

Yeah, I'm trying to stay tough for everyone doing much better today just needed to here some RIU homie words of wisdom to keep me on the right focus

My sincerest condolences. That is horrible. Stay strong, and for those who are also suffering. Every day will be different, and others will grieve in their own way, and at different times. Try to focus on the time you had together. So sorry.

Life fades to black, smelling of storms past
Death begins a gentle breeze, blowing souls to a new destiny
A place unseen, yet known from birth
Our bodies feed the earth, our souls light the skies
As the moon begins to sigh
Oceans weep bringing music to mans sleep
So fret not my friend, for life has begun again
In the memories and smells of storms past

I've never had children but after a brother passing young a friend & I started watching our parents & others who had suffered a loss
such as yourself,well me & him figured out that was the most pain possible while on the earth.
I can't feel your pain but I know God is the answer he had a son. I'll be praying for you. GL!

I would give you a man hug. A proper man hug. I cannot speak of such terrible loss. All I could do is offer a strong shoulder.

my deepest condolences.

I lost my Dad in 07', I feel you completely.
We are never prepared to lose a Loved One No Matter how Strong we think we are.

I though I was light steel but my heart crumpled like Dust during that time.

I am not religious, more spiritual and not the silly crap.
I was born a Jew, I am Non Practising.

I don't know what religion you are and it's not what matters.

As a Jew we have strict rules to follow during mourning, it's called "sitting Shiva".

for 7 days We Jews are supposed to Mourn then when Shiva ends we are to return to our lives and move on.

We gather together with loved ones, family and Friends as most all do under the circumstance.

there are other customs that don't matter, it's the people and the attitudes that make Shiva.

To honor the Lost Loved one and to care for each other deeply while our souls are raw from pain and loss is a job shared by all.

The reality of your loss is a heavy weight Shiva simply tells you when to let go the weight of the loss.

Not all people can let go so quickly of the pain and emotion, specially younger people who have never thought about Mortality and it's Part in Life.

The point I am trying to make is you need the support of others, friends, family, loved ones.

Death is a great burden, it is a little easier when carried on many shoulders and not just yours.

PM me at any time should you need to.

I am sure many people here will reach out to you and we all mean it.

If you want to drink be careful as it can make depression overwhelming.

The best "high" you can get right now is Love.

Pot helps too!

Bless you and your Family,
DZ

I lost a daughter and can honestly tell you the only thing that will help with the pain is time. Keep yourself occupied with work, keep your mind on your work and work as much as possible. Eventually the pain will ease and life will get better, but you will never forget.

Thinking about you and your family. I am terribly sorry for your loss and hope you are able to find peace.

Stay strong and keep yourself busy! Dont drink to much it will only make you feel worse.

sorry to hear that bro keep your head up

I can share your pain bro. I lost my grandson in July @ three months old. I don't have any answers, its the worse thing a family can go through. Trying to be strong for my daughter and other grandkids is all I can draw power from. Lots of prayers have helped me, though I'm not real religous, but I have faith. Stay strong. Peace

And I never could get myself to start this thread, thanks, now I have a place to read the support.

We lost an adult daughter going on 3 years now. It still hurts something bad. My husband aged over night, he went from red hair (yes, he was a ginger) to white hair within 6 months.

Nothing helps but time.

Drinking may not be the answer... keep your head straight and stay focused. This is staying strong.
I can't imagine what you're going through and am sorry that you are going through this, continue to cry when you need to
get support from the ones you love and give them support as well.
You need each other right now,
And more than anything else... you're not alone!!!
*man hug*
Sending good vibes
SH420

so sorry to hear

Drinkings not the answer, but if you can handle it, meaning if your not an alcoholic or a violent drunk.....then indulge if it helps. If anything, it does dull the pain temporarily, and has helped me thru some of these last few months. But everyone is different, I can drink and think and morn and function. Sometimes it's the way for me to find my inner self and try and make sense of it all. It's really hard bro, I wish you the best. Life is presious and let the ones you have around you know how much you love them. Peace

fuck man..this is terrible. I am so sorry to hear about your loss. I am around your age and have a 5 year old little boy. I love him more than i love anything on this entire plane of exsistence. there is nothing I cherish more than his life. I would joyously give my own in return for his... I do not know how or why it would even be worth it to continue on without him in my life. I could never imagine how you feel but i at least want to say im sorry. sometimes it helps to talk about it, do not be afraid to.




just remember friend...sometimes as mere animals we do not understand or even see the entire big picture. I know it hurts now and it will for a really long time, but someone or something needed your childs' soul, spirit and energy more than we did, just because his physical presence on this reality is no longer here does not mean he is gone forever.



either way, im sorry man

honestly, i've never been the one to cope with a loss which is the 4th reason why i getting lifted. all i can say is remember the moments you've shared with your dearly departed, that's the sweetest joy of a memory or photo of one. it's the moment in time you shared. peace be with you bro.

Thanks everyone y'all just made my day. Don't worry Im not an alcoholic it just seemed like a good way to vent at the time with no meds and I only drink about 1-4 times a month. Its hard when I'm reminded about it but my heart has stopped hurting. I still have a son who is almost three and he keeps our chins up. I plan on keeping a hard focus on what is needed for my family and the green thumb keeps me happily pre occupied.