Great Stoner Quotes

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budtoker91

Active Member
On the bike path with 3 friends burnin one down and 2 bikers ride by. my friend goes..


"Watch out for the 90 degree drop at the end"

I laughed my ass off for ever :blsmoke:
 
J

Jero

Active Member
my favorite one i remeber right now. My buddy Dylan and i chillin in our school's caf one morning. I had just finished blazin with a buddy and i totally got a mad rush for the munchies so i ordered the schools "Minnie". One hashbrown, two peices of toast, 2 slices of bacon and one egg scrambled. The ultimate stoner breakfast, when the krew shows up. I could totally tell they too had just finished blazin and dyl and i started talking about how shitty the bacon was. I was just about to throw it away when dylan looked at me real serious, grabbed my arm and said "Dude....What if they shipped this bacon off to indonesia and the little kids there make tires out of them. NO...WAIT....What if they did burn outs, and the fuckin ground smelt like cooked bacon when they were down?.....DOOD, THAT WOULD BE SO TIGHT"
 
B

buffalosoulja

Well-Known Member
Ah man i really screwed up this time ,rents due, and I dont have any money, i better shape up and find a new job quick, but first maybe i'll get a little high.
-Towelieeeee:bigjoint:


My thoughts exactly
 
Baz

Baz

Well-Known Member
Knock Knock.....

stoner 1: Dude, someones at the door
stoner 2: ya i kno..
stoner 1: shouldn't you like answer it?
stoner 2: erm i dunno, who you think it is?
stoner 1: (pause) i don't know dude
stoner 1: Shall i answer the door dude?
stoner 2: yea sure man, you go answer the door
stoner !: i wonder who it could be this early (1:45 pm)

stoner 1: man! theres no fuker there, wtf is all that about..
stoner 2 thats fuken freaky man.
 
A

alexis plant

Active Member
After a session a friend said," my memory sux, it ain't the weed either, I been forgetting shit as long as I can remember" that had us rolling for a while.
 
I

iplaystoned

Active Member
Friend 1: "I heard smokin' doesn't actually make you thirsty, you just think you are thirsty"

Friend 2: "Not true cause I'm thirsty as shit"
 
Dislexicmidget2021

Dislexicmidget2021

Well-Known Member
Confuseus once say: It is better to have lobster on piano than crabs on youre organ.

-You can pick youre friends and you can pick youre nose,but you cant wipe youre friends on the back of the sofa!
 
tckfui

tckfui

Well-Known Member
tellephons are fucking crazy!!! how does a magnet pick up the vibrations of my voice and translate it into some strange electrical code, and than a second magnet translates this electrisity into some vibrations... that happen to be my voice, simply amazing... I'm high... or am I?
 
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