Have I messed things up for my friend?

H

heartz

Member
Hi Everyone,

I just joined this group yesterday basically because I need some views and advises if I have caused big problems for one of my best friends, or I guess you could now say x-friend:(
My friend, just like me is a chronic pain patient. He smokes weed and has a medical license for this. He is allowed to grow a few plants at home but has three time as many as he is allowed to have.

We had a big fight awhile ago basically because I questioned if smoking pot was a wise thing to do mostly because he found out that he had serious heart disorder half a year ago which does that he has very high palpitations. Anyways, we were text messaging each other and suddenly he literally freaks out on me. I'm not sure but I'm guessing it is a sentence where I mention that he his pain doc. prescribed him x number of plant but now he has x number of plants which is three time as many. In addition I use the word weed several time in the same text.
He replies that he don't know what the fuck I'm talking about and that I must be talking about the wrong person. Then he calls my voice mail and yells hatefully- "Don't text me again, thanks!" Literally that scares me a bit and I write back to him that if he is going to be that upset over something like this,(me being concerned about him) then erase my number. He replies deleted, god riddance you fucking pain in the arse!

I had expected him to get a little angry but nothing like this. I have never heard him like this. I know that what I wrote was really harsh and to some extend rude and that I should have worded myself different but yea....it both shocked and hurt me.We don't talk for a month after that. After several text msg and email from me where I apology for being harsh with him and saying that I'm sorry that we fought, he agrees to talk to me over skype about it.(We live in different countries)
2 min. into the talk, he starts saying highly insulting things about me, one thing after another which has nothing to do with the text msg at all. Things I never could have said to my worst enemy and that he is fully aware, prob. are some of the most hurtful things he could have said to me. He then says that because of me, he now have been sitting every day inside his apartment as a nervous wreck waiting for the police to knock in his doors and that he could risk 6 months of prison. And that he now have to manage with only a little dose of weed ever day. He says that I have no idea how much problems I have caused for him. That he has been spending 3 weeks in hospital++not sure what that was about. He is so load and angry that I hardly manage to say a word and besides Im already crying as I don't understand anything and it seems as he almost thinks I wrote it to hurt him. He also says because of this we could never be friends again. Nothing make much sense to me. I have no clue why the police would ever be in the picture after some text msg but the only thing I manage to say is how could i know? When he wishes me well after saying all those highly insulting things he said, I hang up on him as it just too much for me to take.

Some weeks later down the road when I'm still highly confused about the whole thing, I do some google search where it is mentioned that the phone companies monitors text msgs and that sometimes when you use certain words or pictures in a text, the telemarketing companies computer database pulls it. After that, it gets reviewed by one of the employees, they will decide whether to flag you or not. Once you're flagged, all of you texts will be monitored, and they can also choose to monitor your phone calls. Either way, every text you send/receive is entered into a database, forever. The phone company can decide if it serious enough they will send it to the police. I had absolutely no clue about it at all. I have always though monitoring a persons phone was highly illegal. I know in my country it at least is. Anyways, I read it on a forum and some of the guys said is just bull and that is doesn't happen...I don't know what to believe. Is this true and have I messed up my friends life completely?

I know he has a pay phone so I would think that would decrease the chance for anything to happen to him a little? Also, if he have had to remove the other plants that he wasn't allowed to have, they really have no evidence as I can see it but I guess the thing is that he never know if the police could turn up on his door... Can the police get a warrent over a text msg?

I know it was a stupid and unthoughtful thing of me to do-so I don't need to hear it again. I was just being worried about him and I never knew text msg. could be read by some else than him himself. I would never want to hurt him or cause problems for him with purpose, never. We met online and have been very close friends for over two years and he meant a lot to me.
I'm also not here no argue whether or not cannabis can be dangerous to people with heart disorder but simply here to find out if I have messed things up for my friend and why he is so extremely angry and says we never can be friends again. Thanks for all insights:)
 
FootClan

FootClan

Well-Known Member
are you a girl?? only a girl would get mad and say something about a guys growroom having more plants then hes suppose too..... Even saying someting like that out load is reason enough for me never to speak to you again........

That is serious shit dont mess with peoples freedom......
 
H

heartz

Member
I'm a girl, yes. I said that he has a serious heart disorder and he could eventually end up getting a pacemaker. His grandfather died when he was 60 from heart failure and his aunt also had a heart disorder. They both have had several bypass surgeries for it(his grandfather and aunt)I'm not gains weed but I don't understand he wanted to jepordize with his health just to smoke...
 
txpete77

txpete77

Well-Known Member
Phone companies do not turn paying customers over to the police...

Why would the phone company turn in a paying customer to the police? If they do this they will lose a paying customer. If and when word gets out that a company engages in this practice, people will leave in masses to find another provider who will not engage in that type of activity. No company would want to ever alienate themselves like that.

We're talking about a little weed here, not UBL's cousin trying to sneak another loaded toner cartridge into the country.

I would say your friend needs to slow down on whatever he's taking, because he sounds freakishly paranoid by the way you describe it.
 
B

BrockMonday

Active Member
Your friend had an episode that had nothing to do with you. He needs mental help. With most phone companies I have dealt with when a text is deleted by both parties it is gone. The only way the police would know is if they had a sniffer on him already which is unlikely if he isn't a big time grower.
 
H

heartz

Member
Thanks for the replies. Yea, I know its strange. I think that either he mostly got offended by what I wrote and thought that I was trying to judge him-and now he is trying to get back on me. Or- he is a bit paranoid about the whole thing and are actually afraid something could happen to him. Maybe its a combination of both. In addition he struggles with several issues and is severely depressed so maybe the whole fight just pushed him over the edge. I'm wondering now what he said about staying at the hospital for 3 weeks.....When I was talking to him on skype, he was yelling to me that he didn't understand why I did this to him as he considered me to be his best friend. Well, to me being a friend isnt just someone who agrees with everything you do or always tells you what you want to hear. Anyways, I know I should have dealt with it differently.
Here is what someone posted on another forum: Im with OSG. I say it all the time. Every cell carrier has a database that holds EVERY text you send. the police do not even need a warrant to gain access to it.

I know plenty of people who thought they were untouchable that got popped like this. the worst part is you dont even know its coming, then it happens and they have everything in writing at your court date.
Read the article: http://news.cnet.com/Police-Blotter-Armed-robbers-nabbed-through-text-messages/2100-1036_3-6231980.html

Some of the ground rules remain unsettled, with defense attorneys frequently arguing that privacy laws and the U.S. Constitution's Fourth Amendment suggest that archived text messages should be--legally speaking--difficult to obtain. Police, on the other hand, believe that they should be much easier to obtain.

In last year's wire fraud case, defense attorneys said prosecutors should have requested a proper search warrant signed by a judge. They lost, with the judge saying only a subpoena signed by a prosecutor was needed."
 
FootClan

FootClan

Well-Known Member
It has nothing to do with the phone company IMO the issue isnt will the phone company record or look at his text the issue is that you threatened his freedom by even saying something like that wether it was face to face or on phone or on text it dosent matter..........

Once i was dating this girl and we were arguing about something and all of a sudden she says " and what would the cops think about your weed garden" ok that was it, once she said that then i now know she can never be trusted again...Once you saything like that then it tells the other person that down the line you might actually follow through with your threats........ After the fight was over she said she was just mad and she would never call the police on me....

Dosent matter too late her true colors came out and you dont fuckin play with peoples freedom........ And like i said if you had said that to me i would have never spoken to you again.......The hole phone company thing is stupid and besides the point. there not going to track his text or turn him in i talk about weed all the time on the phone ...... make sense??
 
FootClan

FootClan

Well-Known Member
txpete77 said:
Phone companies do not turn paying customers over to the police...

Why would the phone company turn in a paying customer to the police? If they do this they will lose a paying customer. If and when word gets out that a company engages in this practice, people will leave in masses to find another provider who will not engage in that type of activity. No company would want to ever alienate themselves like that.

We're talking about a little weed here, not UBL's cousin trying to sneak another loaded toner cartridge into the country.

I would say your friend needs to slow down on whatever he's taking, because he sounds freakishly paranoid by the way you describe it.
Click to expand...


dont forget theres two sides to the story i mean its not like girls dont scuew the truth im sure theres more then meets the eye
 
txpete77

txpete77

Well-Known Member
Just taking her at her word...

Fortunately I've never had anyone threaten me with anything like you've described. Like you said, that's just something you don't fuck around with.
 
billy4479

billy4479

Moderator
i dont use cell phones i think its retared to text and it lets people say things they couldnt or wouldnt say to your face somtimes just talking to sombody in person is the way to go about things the one thing i all ways thought funny about the texters is they say things like an emoition was attached to the text ....somthing like i said how are you ...and they just text back fine ...like it was a bad "fine" or somthing not a mellow fine or maybe it was a angy fine as you its hard to explain here too what i mean beause i cant change my tone or you cant read my face if ... anyway i think texting is retarded
 
H

Hornchen

Member
Personally - any mention of anything illegal outside the 3 inch conversation range - your stepping on dangerous territory. No, you didn't rat him out . . directly. If I was him I'd be a nervous wreck or worried I'd have to cut back my growing based upon what 'could' happen.

Worry about yourself and not other people or their medical situations - if you were a diabetic would you you want someone complaining about you carrying around too many needles at once time? Analogy is a stretch but I have a feeling the person and their doctors have a better hold on whats good or bad for that specific person.

Lastly - Negative - Telephone text messages are NOT held by the telephone company. I recently was in federal court ( arrested, never convicted haha ) and they subpoenaed my telephone records and all that was 'able to be produced' were your incoming and outgoing phone records. I had numerous text messages I was concerned about and after over 3 years of phone records were pulled, not a single text message was produced. They even specifically requested text messages and the phone companies ( Sprint and Tmobile ) both reported they were unable to produce text messages. - - Now, I don't encourage you or anyone to text compromising information - but its not enough to p!ss your bed at night.
 
H

heartz

Member
God, he was one of my best and most supportive friends, we have been through so much things together that I sincerely no one else have to go through. Awhile ago, he followed me go through a life threatening surgery, which I will have to go through again now soon. Why would I have any interest at all turning him up again the police???
You dont know our past and what we have been through together and I am not going to write about it here either. You can believe what you want anyway. For the record I dont really have a particular interest in turning my friends or other people for that matter, in the spotlight of the police- even if I get angry. Its just stupid.
Why would I even bother to set up an account on this forum if I wasnt honestly concern about him and wanted to find out if I have done anything that could have hurt him in any way?

For people who arent used to dealing with this stuff (with that i mean things that are look upon as illegal) and have no experience with it, there are things that we arent aware of and that we dont think would ever have caused any threat or be any problem. Logically, because we havent dealt with those things before. Its not like he havent texted me about when he was smoking, tripping, drugged up....He just havent used the exactly words about it. If he had told me, that texting anything related to it was an absloutt no no-of course I would never have dont it.

I really wish he never would have shared with me or told me anything about the plants he had in the first pace and all that stuff and just kept it to himself.

Also, what you dont seem to understand is that it is actually possible to be concern about a person. It is a fact that smoking weeds increases the heart rate. When the doctors first diagnosed him with a abnormal shaped and enlarged heart and with a puls which averaged 140 beats a min for the test and topped 200 BPM resting. they didnt manage to find any medications which managed to lower his heart rate enough and then it was said that his only option was a pacemaker. Then, luckily he saw a new heart specialist who was willing to prescribe a un-tested new heart medicine, of course having the option he tried the new medicine. It was a very strong drug that had a lot of side effects but after a while it got better and it managed to lower his heart rate to an ok level. Of course, the medication isnt doing anything other than covering the symptoms. its not doing anything with the actual cause of his heart problems. ....Then you add the extra-stress of smoking pot to it. Do you think that is a wise idea? I dont think smoking anything is a good idea, specially in larger amount without even vaporizing it when u have issues with your heart. Some studies have said you have a 4-5 time as high chance dying of a heart attack 20- 1 hour after smoking. I know, i know its highly debatable.

You have prob. seen a episode om tokin daily show on youtube before. You can hear what he says about having heart prob .and smoking weed here: http://www.youtube.com/user/tokinGLX#p/search/0/dsQ1yaTVqQo

You can also read this tread here:
http://forum.grasscity.com/medical-marijuana/103293-weed-increased-heart-rate.html

Do you really think that he ever would have told his heart doc. that he was smoking weed and how much?
Anyways, it doesnt really matter now. I should just have stayed out of it all.

There is a lot of more things to it and it wasnt only his heartissues I was concerned about. I have seen him go in a down-wards spiral both mentally and physically during the last year which isnt very easy to watch. Especially when you are dealing with a lot of issues yourself too and especially when you care a lot about the person and you dont want they to give up on life. I was afraid of loosing him, I felt in addition to my own problems I couldnt cope with it and I got upset about it. I got upset that he has made me love and care so much about him, when he just didnt care about his health at all and just could end up disappering some day from me. Maybe I even loved him more than a normal friend.

It wasnt just the weed that was in the picture. He had a past with doing drugs and when things went wrong in his life and got difficult, which a lot of things went especially during this last year, he sometimes turned into self-medications with strong pain meds.

In terms of talking instead of texting, it wasnt that I didnt want to speak to him about it. But he lives on the other side of the world from me and we need to talk through skype, which will say it isnt as easy as just picking up the phone. You both need to be close to your comp. What was stupid, was that he was actually texting me when we had the fight that we could speak more about it on skype another time- but I though he was just making up excuses and that it wouldnt happen in a long time. Besides english, isnt my native lanuage and you can imagine having an upheated disscusion on something like this, with a person who has a high temp.

I do think what Hornchen probably is close to the case. I do believe when I spoke to him on Skype, he had already gotten rid of the plants "that he wasnt allowed" to have. And prob. because he is is so concerned about "what could happen" and if the police is now is "aware" of him and can decide to show up on his door or not, but never being able to know when.....That would also make it very hard for him to get any more plants ever again and now he has to suffer because of it. It sucks and there is nothing I can do to change it now. I do sincerely hope that is true that text msg are hold by phone companies but it just seem to be very different views of it. Im just mostly worried that the police in some case could be warned now and have him under their view:-(
Maybe it is different from country to country and it also has to do with the different service providers?

Someone posted this on a forum: It was about texting your dealer.

Deleting anything off your phone will not help you.

If you are under investigation the police can pull your text messages just as easily as phone number records. AND even listen to your calls if they have pull with NSA. You all need to realize, there is no more 'illegal' wire taps. And even before bush alot of taps happend without judges signature.

NSA no longer just taps one number. They have full access to all information from ATT/Verizon/ect. The ATT whistle blower said that they basicly use a splitter at ATT into the NSA room. But for someone to pull strings at NSA your under some heavy shit and its more then just some sacks of weed.

Nothing is safe over the phone period. Not to mention just having your phone on in your pocket you can be tracked via cell tower triangulation.

Whenever I call my dude, I just ask if he is straight and if he is got some time.
 
H

heartz

Member
Thanks for all the replies by the way:) I do appreciate them, even though I get a little offended when someone is trying to imply that any of the things were actually written to hurt him in any way.
 
FootClan

FootClan

Well-Known Member
heartz said:
God, he was one of my best and most supportive friends, we have been through so much things together that I sincerely no one else have to go through. Awhile ago, he followed me go through a life threatening surgery, which I will have to go through again now soon. Why would I have any interest at all turning him up again the police???
You dont know our past and what we have been through together and I am not going to write about it here either. You can believe what you want anyway. For the record I dont really have a particular interest in turning my friends or other people for that matter, in the spotlight of the police- even if I get angry. Its just stupid.
Why would I even bother to set up an account on this forum if I wasnt honestly concern about him and wanted to find out if I have done anything that could have hurt him in any way?

For people who arent used to dealing with this stuff (with that i mean things that are look upon as illegal) and have no experience with it, there are things that we arent aware of and that we dont think would ever have caused any threat or be any problem. Logically, because we havent dealt with those things before. Its not like he havent texted me about when he was smoking, tripping, drugged up....He just havent used the exactly words about it. If he had told me, that texting anything related to it was an absloutt no no-of course I would never have dont it.

I really wish he never would have shared with me or told me anything about the plants he had in the first pace and all that stuff and just kept it to himself.

Also, what you dont seem to understand is that it is actually possible to be concern about a person. It is a fact that smoking weeds increases the heart rate. When the doctors first diagnosed him with a abnormal shaped and enlarged heart and with a puls which averaged 140 beats a min for the test and topped 200 BPM resting. they didnt manage to find any medications which managed to lower his heart rate enough and then it was said that his only option was a pacemaker. Then, luckily he saw a new heart specialist who was willing to prescribe a un-tested new heart medicine, of course having the option he tried the new medicine. It was a very strong drug that had a lot of side effects but after a while it got better and it managed to lower his heart rate to an ok level. Of course, the medication isnt doing anything other than covering the symptoms. its not doing anything with the actual cause of his heart problems. ....Then you add the extra-stress of smoking pot to it. Do you think that is a wise idea? I dont think smoking anything is a good idea, specially in larger amount without even vaporizing it when u have issues with your heart. Some studies have said you have a 4-5 time as high chance dying of a heart attack 20- 1 hour after smoking. I know, i know its highly debatable. But most of the studies i have read is on unbound medline which i think you can say is mostly free of the propaganda issues you are experiencing with some of the studies studies that are done on cannabis.

You have prob. seen a episode om tokin daily show on youtube before. You can hear what he says about having heart prob .and smoking weed here: http://www.youtube.com/user/tokinGLX#p/search/0/dsQ1yaTVqQo

You can also read this tread here:
http://forum.grasscity.com/medical-marijuana/103293-weed-increased-heart-rate.html

Do you really think that he ever would have told his heart doc. that he was smoking weed and how much?
Anyways, it doesnt really matter now. I should just have stayed out of it all.

There is a lot of more things to it and it wasnt only his heartissues I was concerned about. I have seen him go in a down-wards spiral both mentally and physically during the last year which isnt very easy to watch. Especially when you are dealing with a lot of issues yourself too and especially when you care a lot about the person and you dont want they to give up on life. I was afraid of loosing him, I felt in addition to my own problems I couldnt cope with it and I got upset about it. I got upset that he has made me love and care so much about him, when he just didnt care about his health at all and just could end up disappering some day from me. Maybe I even loved him more than a normal friend.

It wasnt just the weed that was in the picture. He had a past with doing drugs and when things went wrong in his life and got difficult, which a lot of things went especially during this last year, he sometimes turned into self-medications with strong pain meds.

In terms of talking instead of texting, it wasnt that I didnt want to speak to him about it. But he lives on the other side of the world from me and we need to talk through skype, which will say it isnt as easy as just picking up the phone. You both need to be close to your comp. What was stupid, was that he was actually texting me when we had the fight that we could speak more about it on skype another time- but I though he was just making up excuses and that it wouldnt happen in a long time. Besides english, isnt my native lanuage and you can imagine having an upheated disscusion on something like this, with a person who has a high temp.

I do think what Hornchen probably is close to the case. I do believe when I spoke to him on Skype, he had already gotten rid of the plants "that he wasnt allowed" to have. And prob. because he is is so concerned about "what could happen" and if the police is now is "aware" of him and can decide to show up on his door or not, but never being able to know when.....That would also make it very hard for him to get any more plants ever again and now he has to suffer because of it. It sucks and there is nothing I can do to change it now. I do sincerely hope that is true that text msg are hold by phone companies but it just seem to be very different views of it. Im just mostly worried that the police in some case could be warned now and have him under their view:-(
Maybe it is different from country to country and it also has to do with the different service providers?

Someone posted this on a forum: It was about texting your dealer.

Deleting anything off your phone will not help you.

If you are under investigation the police can pull your text messages just as easily as phone number records. AND even listen to your calls if they have pull with NSA. You all need to realize, there is no more 'illegal' wire taps. And even before bush alot of taps happend without judges signature.

NSA no longer just taps one number. They have full access to all information from ATT/Verizon/ect. The ATT whistle blower said that they basicly use a splitter at ATT into the NSA room. But for someone to pull strings at NSA your under some heavy shit and its more then just some sacks of weed.

Nothing is safe over the phone period. Not to mention just having your phone on in your pocket you can be tracked via cell tower triangulation.

Whenever I call my dude, I just ask if he is straight and if he is got some time.
Click to expand...
"Then you add the extra-stress of smoking pot to it" ? have you ever smoked pot?? it dosent cause stress its RELIEVES it....lol further more there studies that will prove what ever you want to prove if your "for" somthing you will find studies for it if your "against" the same thing then you can find studies against it.....It likes "stutistics" you can shape and scuew any pole to prove what ever point you are trying to prove thats why polls and stutisctics are BULLSHIT.... we learned that in collage....

NSA Tapping our phones?? LOL get in touch with reality lady the NSA isnt tapping our phones as if they have time to worry about a small closet grow with a couple plants......... It way cost more to pay the agents to work the case then they would bust you for in cannibas... clearly you have no business debating anything Cannabis related..... why are you posting this stuff on here i dont understand the reason behind it....... I get that you love that dude and he hates you and you said somthing you shouldnt have but other then that i dont get the point.

You say he shouldnt smoke because he has a bad heart but like the other guy said thats between him and his doctor not you... Also you said he was on meds that cause LOTS of side effects..... further showing you dont understand what your talking about if you did then you would know that cannibas is used world wide to treat many side affects associated with drug side effects...
 
H

heartz

Member
NSA...i dont even know who they are. I dont live in the US. I was only posting it as it said they had access to the phone companies and wanted to know who they were and whether there were any truth to it or not.

The sideeffects I was talking about was blurred vision from his heart medicine, if weed helps for that, well thats new for me. I didnt say he had any problems with it nowadays. As Ive said before, im not against weed as you seem to think i am. I know it is helpful for a lot of people and that is to some acually are the only thing that helps. Its not for nothing they have started producing meds from it.
As for the cardivascular effects on it, you might want to read up on it if you dont believe it could cause any harm at all if you are struggling with tachycardia. But as s you are prob healthy, it doesnt have anything to say for you.

Obviously I came here to look for some answers which you have all tried to give me. Thanks for the help and good bye.
 
0calli

0calli

Well-Known Member
because of cell phone privacy laws and plainly the number of cell phones in the country unless your friend has been busted for an extreme amount of pot before t
he chances of them reading or paying attention to him are not there period so dont worry about that
 
B

BrockMonday

Active Member
The cell phone companies can produce records of who was texted but they don't keep a database of the info that was texted.
 
FootClan

FootClan

Well-Known Member
heartz said:
NSA...i dont even know who they are. I dont live in the US. I was only posting it as it said they had access to the phone companies and wanted to know who they were and whether there were any truth to it or not.

The sideeffects I was talking about was blurred vision from his heart medicine, if weed helps for that, well thats new for me. I didnt say he had any problems with it nowadays. As Ive said before, im not against weed as you seem to think i am. I know it is helpful for a lot of people and that is to some acually are the only thing that helps. Its not for nothing they have started producing meds from it.
As for the cardivascular effects on it, you might want to read up on it if you dont believe it could cause any harm at all if you are struggling with tachycardia. But as s you are prob healthy, it doesnt have anything to say for you.

Obviously I came here to look for some answers which you have all tried to give me. Thanks for the help and good bye.
Click to expand...
Im glad that you acknowlage that cannibas can be used to ease the pain of sick people...thank you.........

and ANYTHING you light on FIRE and inhale into your lungs is going to be bad for you....LOL this is know already...
 
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