I tried to kill my self a year or so ago. I was just depressed and lonely. I swallowed a bunch of pills and was throwing up for a couple days. My parents still think I was just sick. Im more the type that doesn't tell anyone about my sadness or depression, I don't tell anyone of my plans for suicide. My friends and family would think I was fine and until I turned up dead. Since then i decided it was a very selfish way to run out on my problems, my family and friends would have been crushed for almost no good reason. If they didn't care, if they weren't there, or if it wouldn't make them sad I probably would have killed my self by now. I feel that if there is judgment after death by some God be it mine or someone else's, it would take everything into account. Your sadness, your pain, your happiness, what you have done to help people in your life, what you have done to hurt people. Sometimes the pain is just too great, sometimes the sadness is too great, sometimes it isn't really the persons fault, sometimes you just want to die.