Thanks Wikid. But custodial and family law is fucked up.I've read about cases where children had actually been sexually abused,and there was evidence of this abuse,but the mother was still punished for contempt.They told me a 12 year old is not old enough to decide this.My lawyer said I should punish her and force her to go.I told him I won't punish her, ever, for feeling strongly about something. But she has decided she will go and meet him in a public place,just to try to save my ass.They are also ordered to attend counseling together....they treat her like she has the problem when it's him.He's got a violent record a mile long, but it doesn't seem to matter.I told her we'd just have to get him another way. We bought her a phone for Christmas,and she has a DS-i,which takes pictures. I told her if he ever starts getting violent on the weekends she must be with him,she must call 911 on him.I told her not to let him know she had a phone,to keep it turned off unless it's an emergency.If he beats his girlfriend,I told her to try to get a pic of him doing it if she could.She said he also leaves hard core porn mags lying around where she can see them...I told her to take pics.I told her to take a pic if his house is filthy,(not cluttered, but actually filthy, like dog shit lying around and shit), if there is no food in the cupboard.I told her to take pics with a time stamp on them of his stupid ass lying around sleeping during his visitations.We'll just have to get him another way,I told her. And this time, if he does anything like he did before, which was attempt to kick his daughter down a flight of steps because she wasn't moving fast enough because he was trying to leave before the cops his girlfriend had called got there,I will simply go over to his house and kill him.I may go to prison for sure then, but my kid would be safe.He's asked me several times about the money I got because he's on disability and now the government pays his child support for him.Because that's really what it's all about.He wants her money.He must have spent his. I told him the only people I have to answer to are the folks at the SS administration,and that's all itemized to their satisfaction.He's fucked with me for 12 years now, using our daughter as a weapon,and he has the nuts to say I need counseling because I'm angry about it. He said,"You're just disappointed it never worked out between us...." I laughed in his ear for fifteen minutes. This sonofabitch treated me like shit....I was a virgin when I met him....he deliberately infected me with an STI,then tried to say I gave it to him.He used to spit on his palm and grease his cock up and shove it in me dry,and laughed when I said it hurt. Every time I'd piss after sex,it would burn like fire because I had little tears in my vagina.He started slapping me in the face, pretending he was playing at first...but he'd do it hard...testing the waters to see how far he could go.He slapped me when I was holding the baby in the kitchen...I hauled off and hit him in the ear....now he's got ear problems and it sent him into a rage...he tried to yank her out of my arms,and I turned because I was afraid he'd just toss her aside...so he settled for pushing the back of my head into the wall.Then he tried to throw a cast iron skillet at me one night because he had an earache and I wasn't finding the Tylenol fast enough.He alienated me from people,told lies about my character, made fun of me and put me down.I was young and dumb,18,and I stayed for almost two years because I had been taught good girls stayed with one man all their life.Like any dumbass in that situation,I looked for fault on my part. Then one day,I was taking a shower.Now, I've never been a "skinny" girl,but I wasn't fucking morbidly obese or anything....this fucker,who at the time was 6'7" and about 380,none of it muscle(He's since gained about 100 pounds-he eats an entire box of Banquet chicken nearly every day for lunch), looks at me wrapped in my towel and says,"Look at you.You're getting so fat. I could do so much better than you."
And I thought...."I can be this miserable all by myself.I certainly don't need any help from this bastard."
So the next time he left,I gathered up as much shit as I could in a couple of trash bags and took my kid and left. I took all the toothpaste, shampoo,toilet paper, and groceries.I left him a sink full of dirty dishes.
After I finished laughing over the phone at him,I said,"OH YEAH...I'm SOOOOOO disappointed it never worked out.....who wouldn't miss a sasquatch looking needle dick like you who thinks a chest cold means extra lubrication?You couldn't find your way around a woman with a map and a pen light.You think a clit is one of those pointy things on the bottom of a football player's shoes.Man,my heart is breaking, you fucking mouth breather!"
And he gets all quiet. "Why, you really hate me, don't you? Just admit it!"
And I said,"No shit,Sherlock!"
And this is what I deal with. And if I run him over and shit on his forehead,
I'M the one who goes to jail. Why, the absence of his farts alone would solve 80 percent of the global warming problem!
I know nothing about high blood pressure medicine, but just reading what you're going through made me tear up. For the health stuff, I'm glad you caught it before you had a stroke. But what's going on with your ex and your daughter just sucks. If she's a teenager she should be able to choose whether or not she has to see her father. I thought the courts DID let a child choose, past a certain age. What's up with that?
I hope you don't get jail time, that would be ridiculous. Jailed for protecting your child, wtf? I have very little faith in the justice system as it is, this does nothing to improve it.
I'm sorry you're having to go through this bullshit. You can vent to me anytime. I wish I could do more
Ew, no fun!We got a bunch of snow, but hell, this is Iowa,it's to be expected.
hey guys its snowing in florida
Thanks, cracker. I've tried meditation in the past....But I have this problem where my mind just won't shut the fuck up.It just keeps going and going,not just on topics that I'm worried about, but there's always some song playing in there,and what sounds like a conversation, shopping lists,etc...the xanax helps, but I don't want to depend on that.And it makes me kinda sleepy.
SH ... I think you received the message that jail sends ... well done
Some don't hear it.
Stoney, oooo that suks, I'm sorry for ur troubles. Blood pressure is always in flux and right now ur under a tremendous amount of stress, and one of ur coping skills (weed) has been taken from you. I think it is understandable ... and TEMPORARY. In time as these events blow over, you should return to a more comfortable level.
You need to create a substitute coping skill, such as meditation. I think u'd be surprised how much the body FOLLOWS the mind.
Good luck in all that you do.