Funny Sex Stories

[Da Mann]

Is that disturbing? Oh shit I thought everyone did that!

AH...NO

A bunch of years ago, I can't really remember how old I was actually- too young to defend myself anyway! Well my dad and my brother and I got totally wasted. It didn't take very long for me as a toddler obviously! Next thing I know we're all wasted and touching each others dongs and shit. Only minor penetration happened, nothing to write home about anyway. We all passed out and boy were we laughing when we woke up!!! Hahahahaha, what a hoot!

Ah....NO

By the way I hope everyone realizes I made that shit up

Ah... NO.

 

[UncleBuck]

Incest ew

smokeydan would be interested in some incest.

 

[giggles26]

? That's disgusting

The ? Tells me your not so sure yourself.

You've never truly lived until you've spent a summer is Alabama....

 

[giggles26]

No thanks. He was talking about someone I don't know

What are you thanking me for? That you have finally accepted that you really love mommy....

 

[thump easy]

i got a lot of them do you want to hear them!!

 

[giggles26]

i got a lot of them do you want to hear them!!

Only if you can incorporate Disney's Bambi into it...


Every time I see you're name that's what I think, ol thumper

 

[thump easy]

THATS ME THATS MY REAL NAME THUMPER LOLZ

 

[giggles26]

Well that would be what I think of lol

 

[thump easy]

no man no sex stories ill get introuble i better not!!!

 

[theexpress]

THATS ME THATS MY REAL NAME THUMPER LOLZ

i herd they had u wearin koolaide lipstikk in da joint.. we dont wanna hear bout dat.. lol jk

 

[thump easy]

i herd they had u wearin koolaide lipstikk in da joint.. we dont wanna hear bout dat.. lol jk

Haha I about coughed up my drink for reals hahaha

 

[thump easy]

I GOT SOME GOOD ONES BUT I BETTER NOT..

 

[bu$hleaguer]

AH...NO


Ah....NO


Ah... NO.

I'm making a sad, previously-molested-as-a-child face, can you see it?

 

[bu$hleaguer]

Shit I know people who come on here telling sex stories to strangers putting there business out there like there writing a fucking book lmao!!!!

You just joined yesterday, how many people do you actually know?

 

[a senile fungus]

You just joined yesterday, how many people do you actually know?

Look at the name! lol they're in disguise! These hooligans!

 

[Da Mann]

Where is yo wife

We got divorced after being married for 20 years.

 

[iconoclast]

This one time I was fucking my ex in the bathroom. Well she flipped over so we could go at it doggy style, and when i look down to watch myself I noticed she had a bit of poop clinging to her butthole. So without missing a beat, I snatched a square of toilet paper, wiped her ass, and threw it into the toilet bowel. Didn't even break my rhythm..

Damn man, my dick would have instantly went soft and would have called her nasty and left. Ladies, please learn how to properly clean your butt holes. No guy wants to smell your ass when he's going down on you or hitting it Doggie.

A dab of lotion on the toilet paper, after your last wipe, works wonders.

 

[iconoclast]

I went home wit dis chica in the burque and it was all good then I started boning her in the morning again.. and she was like I want you to pee in me...

and I was like whaaa.........and she was like I want you to pee....inside me....

and I was like whaaaa.....so I peeed in the bitch and she started making exorcist noises..so I just kept on fuckin

It was pretty weird

That is actually a fantasy of mine, you lucky fucker.

 

[tytheguy111]

I uh. I jerked off one time felt great actually it felt

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[Hookabelly]

Damn man, my dick would have instantly went soft and would have called her nasty and left. Ladies, please learn how to properly clean your butt holes. No guy wants to smell your ass when he's going down on you or hitting it Doggie.

A dab of lotion on the toilet paper, after your last wipe, works wonders.

no shit, man that's NASTY…